Jesus has a special message for you.
ETA: I’ll bring rum to the party. 
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Yeah, I can believe that. 
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You don’t remember Ceiling Cat and the LOL Cats Bible?
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The third one is awesome. More people need to see that.
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You just had to, didn’t you. I played the French horn for many years. The only thing I will say: Those who have honed their embouchure are way better kissers.
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When I played brass, it was trombone and tuba
[sobs in corner]
I’ll leave you with this story:
A girl went out on a date with a trumpet player, and when she came back her roommate asked, “How was it? Was he a good kisser?”
“Nope”, she replied. “That dry, tight, tiny little pucker was no fun at all!”
The next night she went out with a tuba player, and when she came back home her roommate asked, “Well, how was his kissing?”
“Bad”, she replied. “Those huge rubbery blubbery slabs of meat. Oh god it was awful!”
The night after that she went out with a French horn player, and when she came back her roommate asked how his kissing was.
“His kissing was just okay, but I loved the way he held me!”
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Never sob! Never. Those are beautiful instruments. I have a colleague who is married to a tuba player and they have a special room just for his tubas.
Not to brag, but I’ve made out with a fair number of brass players and non-brass players (aka woodwinds or strings). The brass players were better, hands down. Okay, fine, they didn’t know what to do with their hands, but their lips were fine, fine, fine.
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I’m more of a string player (guitar, cello, bass), but I’ve played brass as well.
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Not a very meaningful distinction, since Jesus is a large subset of all memes.
Dag nabbit Jesus! Ima trine to get krunk!
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