So, she keeps her household taser handy for occasions such as this one?
Apostles: Get up, sleepy-head! It’s been three days! [BZZT]
Jesus: Ow what the actual FUCK!?
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That’s the part that gets me.
I mean really, using a tool specifically designed to incapacitate people to get them out of bed?
facepalm
Though i suppose if we’re at this level of absurdity, i suppose we should be grateful she didn’t use a firearm…
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I’d like to hear their literal explanation of Luke 14:33
In the same way, those of you who do not give up everything you have cannot be my disciples.
I assume their reading of it is to give lots of money to the preacher who acts as a proxy for God (the money is just resting in their account). Any other interpretation must be communism.
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“I tased my kid, now I’m going to lie about it”
Screw this idiot parent. I hope the kid makes her life hell for it. “Parenting” in this way drives me crazy. She probably justifies it by saying “My parents are tough on me, and I turned out fine”. Yeah, real fine lady, you’re tazing your kid.
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That’s too easy. They are followers, not disciples. Jesus had twelve disciples, no more, no less. That passage in Luke does not apply.
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Now that it’s harder to just go online and order a “chastening instrument” you have to look elsewhere.
Plus, with Jesus’ relaxation of a lot of the more fiddly bits of mosaic law there are no theological risks to potential sparks or arcing, even on the sabbath!
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Really?
12 is not a “great crowd”
Luke 9 talks about 12 disciples but Luke 10 talks about 72 more.
The best way to fight against bible literalism is to know the bible too.
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Haha! Nothing can contradict the bible like the bible! Thanks for that.
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I always have to say that people like that are one of the few reasons I occasionally regret my atheism. The belief that this woman might spend eternity burning in Hell would be very comforting to me.
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That’s radical religious violence.
Why is it played for laughs when bible believers do it?
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She forgot the single most practical survival point of parenthood: your child picks your nursing home.
Those state ratings? They can be read bottom up, too.
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What are you talking about? Adam & Eve sells a range of kinky bdsm gear including paddles and riding crops.
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Here’s hoping her son comes to visit her in jail and flips her off. She deserves worse.
It reads pretty different without the apostrophe.
I would honestly suspect that the meaning of that is closer to the Buddhist dictum of renouncing attachment than to any literal exhortation to hate people.
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It still doesn’t work that well. When you are also proud of your ignorance of everything including the tenants of the religion you profess to believe in, you can excuse anything. And if two things seem contradictory, that just means it is a mystery you don’t yet understand, and how dare some non-believer think they could understand the deep mysteries of why the bible appears to say X, but Y is more convenient so must be what Jesus really meant.
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I had one of these. My dad would wake me up, if I slept past 9 on a weekend, with a gallon of water. Held his hand when he died (of natural causes), anyhow.
Here’s hoping she gets some help. That’s a lot of anger to be contained in just one bag of meat.
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The article fails to mention tat it was April Fools Day. Humorless teens can’t take a joke?
“Contact tazed” so they mean she used a stun gun? A general class of device that has been a cheap and readily available self-defense tool for decades and not a TASER device, the specific hallmark of which being the fact that it doesn’t require you to get close enough to make contact with a person? If she’d used a TASER, he wouldn’t have raised bumps, he’d have puncture wounds.
I don’t know if it’s just general confusion about the term, or a subtle effort to make TASERs seem less dangerous than they are. Stun guns are nasty, but they’re less likely to be lethal than a TASER.
Regardless, however, it’s still assault and child abuse.
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