Nobody wants to host to 2022 Olympics

boing
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Unbelievable though it may be, the IOC is in fact a non-profit. So is the NFL.

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Maybe there wonā€™t be much snow by the time 2022 rolls around anyway. The winter games in Vancouver and Russia were marred by warm temps and slushy conditions. As climate change continues, I canā€™t see things getting better.

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Norway just dropped out, and apparently the IOCā€™s list of demands was one of the reasons for it:

  • They demand to meet the king prior to the opening ceremony. Afterwards, there shall be a cocktail reception. Drinks shall be paid for by the Royal Palace or the local organizing committee.
  • Separate lanes should be created on all roads where IOC members will travel, which are not to be used by regular people or public transportation.
  • A welcome greeting from the local Olympic boss and the hotel manager should be presented in IOC membersā€™ rooms, along with fruit and cakes of the season. (Seasonal fruit in Oslo in February is a challengeā€¦)
  • The hotel bar at their hotel should extend its hours ā€œextra lateā€ and the minibars must stock Coke products.
  • The IOC president shall be welcomed ceremoniously on the runway when he arrives.
  • The IOC members should have separate entrances and exits to and from the airport.
  • During the opening and closing ceremonies a fully stocked bar shall be available. During competition days, wine and beer will do at the stadium lounge.
  • IOC members shall be greeted with a smile when arriving at their hotel.
  • Meeting rooms shall be kept at exactly 20 degrees Celsius at all times.
  • The hot food offered in the lounges at venues should be replaced at regular intervals, as IOC members might ā€œriskā€ having to eat several meals at the same lounge during the Olympics.

(From Slate)

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Last year, 72% of the Vienna population voted against trying to host the summer games 2028. It was a memorable day as, for once, I did not have to question my fellow citizenĀ“s sanity.

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Is it really so different than Beijing?

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Christ, what assholes!

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You know, Iā€™ll help out too. Their menā€™s ski team can come to my place, and Iā€™ll even install a hot tub for them and throw in the free drinks the IOC people were demanding as a perk. I think they had jello shooters in mind, right?

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It solves a real problem-- namely, athletes getting stuck in traffic before events-- but itā€™s an absurdly costly solution, and itā€™s mixed up with delusions of nobility.

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Yeah, and speaking of which, what is the carbon footprint of the Olympics? Can we even afford that any more? I donā€™t think so, not until weā€™ve reduced inventory by a couple billion (people).

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Itā€™s MPs not MEPsā€¦ but otherwise correct.

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  • The IOC president shall sleep on a bed constructed of dinosaur bones and Dodo bird feathers.
  • IOC members will be granted Droit du seigneur and family members who object will be deported.
  • Briefcases full of local currency shall be provided to all IOC members at all meetings and gatherings.
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If have ever wondered what the mob would be like if it didnā€™t have to hide, just look at the FIFA and the IOC.

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Well, it could solve that problem. Except that the olympic lanes arenā€™t for the athletes, theyā€™re exclusively for the IOC dignitaries.

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To comply with its terms, London must designate 250 miles of dedicated traffic lanes for the exclusive use of athletes and ā€œthe Olympic Family,ā€ including I.O.C. members, honorary members, and ā€œsuch other persons as may be designated by the IOC.ā€ (These traffic lanes are sometimes called ā€œZil lanes,ā€ alluding to the Soviet-era express lanes in Moscow reserved for the politburoā€™s favorite limousines.)

Fuck the IOC dignitaries, but Olympic athletes are the whole point of the games.

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Same thing happens to Salt Lake. Apparently nature loves to dutch oven a city built in a cold valley. [the technical term is inversion]

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So is the NCAA!! HA!

ā€¦all the way to the bank, I tell ya.

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The way it works is that to be ā€œnon-profitā€, the company canā€™t be achieving net profit - but the people who run the company can profit personally as much as you like.

So when tax filing time rolls around and youā€™ve made a net gain of however many billions of dollars compared to your costs, all you need to do is turn that excess into ā€œwagesā€ for the top brass, which you can then count as operating costs, meaning your ā€œcostsā€ now match your income, meaning you didnā€™t make a ā€œprofitā€ as a company.

Itā€™s complete bullshit, but since apparently corporations are people, and since the corporation itself is not the one profitingā€¦

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