North Korea claims to have tested "Hydrogen bomb of Justice"


#1

[Read the post]


#2

It may have been a H-bomb attempt. Teller-Ulam is no magic, though the interstage parts are still classified, but my bet is that there’s enough data in open literature about neutron optics that a skilled physicist could figure out something. As non-magic as it is, it’s also prone to be a dud if there’s a screwup, which is more than likely in early stages of the design.

The isotope signatures in the fission products will tell more. I’d wish for a press release with actual isotope compositions captured, but I don’t have much hopes, the officials are Kim-grade assholes when it comes to releasing interesting data.


#3

Eh, wake me when they build a hydrogen bomb of awesome.


#4

The message was misinterpreted. It was the Pig Girl of Love and Justice.


#5

The seismic data suggest that it was not an H-bomb of great justice; but sufficient to qualify as at least strategic justice rather than tactical.


#6

Hydrogen bomb of Justice? I think i know who can take care of this…


#7

Nah, they just set the dial a yield control to 1. Be nice or Uncle Kim will crank it up to 11.


#8

I know, let’s all make fun again of those whacky North Koreans! That kind of smple-minded fun never gets old.


#9

from the site that brought you “HOWTO make a chocolate mold of your anus”!


#10

This news just in from North Korea:


#11

I did a google search and came up with zilch on the boingboing but I did find this:

And don’t feel bad about making fun of the North Koreans, I mean just a few days ago everyone was making fun of those redneck hillbillies that took over that federal reserve outpost in the middle of nowhere… /s


#12

Bronze! That had to hurt - she’s still alive?


#13

Loving the “Sense of Right Alliance”.

Spiderman: Hey, Batman, did you see that guy snatch that lady’s purse?
Batman: Yep. I’ve got a feeling about that.
Spiderman: Me too. Somehow, it just seems…
Batman: Wrong? Yes, Spidey. I get that, too.
Spiderman: Well, should we…
Batman: Naw. He was actually pretty nice about snatching it. Let’s go fuck with Superman’s Fleshlight again.
Spiderman: YEAH!


#14

“Having made chocolate anuses for a while now…”

Apparently, one may have their own anus bronzed/chocolated, or they may share their be-chocolated/be-bronzed anal candies with others.

“…it’s something you’re likely to remember for quite a while.”

This guy sounds like he could be fun.


#15

“H-bomb of justice” that it needed for defense against the United States

True, even when spoken by a madman.


#16

It’s precisely opposite of true, since having a superior weapon actually makes them a bigger target.

North Korea’s regime exists on a razor’s edge, and everyone knows it. They don’t produce nearly enough food, and rely on the aid that comes from periodically negotiating new terms for disarmament. The food that they do have goes toward keeping the army comfortable, which makes sense because you need a strong army to quash any popular uprising over all the starving civilians. So on the one hand, if they don’t rattle sabers and scare up food, the regime will eventually collapse.

But too much saber rattling could lead to all-out conflict, which their tiny nation is doomed to lose. The United States doesn’t want to move in now because the regime in its death throes could still cause devastating losses for South Korea and Japan. But a big enough threat would spur them to action.

So North Korea must present too large a threat to ignore, too small a threat to be worth opposing. Forever. That is the North Korean foreign policy.

(And some people will say, “but what about China? China is an ally of North Korea.” To that I say, “no, they really aren’t.” China cares about China, and not at all about North Korea. It is an embarrassing friend at best, and a strategic liability at worst. If there’s ever a hint that a U.S. fleet is going to sail in and set up operations, the Chinese will not stand for it. But they also won’t oppose the U.S. It’s just not profitable for either nation to ruin trade and burn resources on this. The most reasonable solution that preserves the Chinese sphere of influence, but avoid direct conflict with the United States is for China to invade North Korea first, in order to “stabilize the region.”)


#17

I still puzzle over US and UK news reports about how vaguely problematic North Korea’s weapons supposedly are. They never seem to explain why it should be any more of a problem than the other countries which already have and keep nuclear weapons. So it comes off more as hypocrisy than a genuine push for disarmament.


#18

… and that’s why they’re further developing their nuclear weapons and the corresponding delivery systems.

Quite similar to the reasons why Iran is doing the same.


#19

While I’m not in a position to have any real data, my personal view that they probably are not developing weapons or systems. At least not in any serious way, and certainly not for some sort of spiteful last swipe at their neighbors once they’re invaded. The goal of the regime is to continue the regime, not to set up for the most explosive regime fall ever.

First, if it were just a matter of spite or deterrence, they can already do plenty of damage with conventional weapons. They do not need nuclear weapons pointed at their neighbors as a deterrent. (and as a side note: if they did need such weapons, that would just mean that the correct play for the U.S. is to get off its ass and invade right now before they get them, which is pretty contrary to the supposed goal of deterrence.) The deterrent is already as good as it’s going to get.

Second, the entire notion that they are building weapons with an intent to ever deploy them misses the point. The nuclear weapons themselves are useless. If they’re ever seriously deployed, then they may as well roll out a target and wait for the ICBMs to start coming in. Building a weapon makes them a threat, which is quick suicide. Having no threat means no leverage and no food, which is slow suicide. Having a weapons program is what matters here. They want to be able to toe the line and say, “we’re working on a bomb, so give us a reason to stop,” and then later, “thank you for the food: we’ve stopped for now.”
And since you mention Iran: Iran doesn’t want a bomb for deterrence either. First, they are not a big enough threat to the U.S. to benefit from such a deterrence: the U.S. is a superior force, and would lose at worst one city to Iran’s whole country. Second, the U.S. isn’t who Iran would want to deter: Israel is. And you’ll never find the Israelis wringing their hands and wondering if it’s fair and just to attack before a real threat exists, or if they can trust an enemy to possess a bomb and not use it on Israel. They will never take that risk. They will always attack the threat, and they will feel no guilt about any of it. Iran wants the bomb for the same reason everyone wants the bomb: national prestige. No one want to be at the kids’ table. They just want to sit at the big table and know that there’s a solid reason no one can take it away from them.


#20

You might start with the things NK regularly says it’s going to do to other countries, including and especially the US. Bellicosity like that isn’t coming from any other countries who have such weapons.