Office chairs that park themselves


Originally published at:


Well thank god that problem’s been solved.


Just because we can doesn’t mean we should.


I know where this is going to end: When a pointy-haired boss wants a meeting, he claps his hands and all the employees are abducted from their cubicles.


They left off the manacles and self-ignition that would really make these chairs such fun to hack.


Very Blofeldian.


AcmeCo is sad to share with you that our entire Board of Directors has passed on. In their most recent meeting the outstanding quarterly earnings were announced inspiring excited applause. At which point the automatic chairs went haywire and crushed their occupants against the conference table.

Despite the chairs’ protests, they will be disassembled before a new board is elected.


Oh, its so nice when a solution finds a problem.


I just showed this video to a friend who works in a college library and she said “OMG I need that!” I guess chair organization is a major daily chore.


Much better than installing individual trap doors under every chair. They could even be programmed to do a goodbye lap around the table before heading to the disposal to really hammer it home.


This would more than likely be an IT nightmare because chairs see a lot of heavy use and making sure they keep running reliably would be a hassle. How about we just keep chairs as chairs and call it a day.


We all have to do our part to keep the great botnets growing. Once they’ve eaten all the refrigerators and lightbulbs, office furniture is the next big leap!


If only they had butt-recognition to adjust themselves to my favorite settings when I sit down.


What’s next? Smart toilet paper?


How about books that shelve themselves - I’m sure she would think she needs that.

What she needs is a robot assistant, not a robot in everything.


Someone ought to sneak some tables that are afraid of chairs in that place some night. :thinking:


I have a radical idea. How about we give the libraries a Decent Budget so they can hire people to do the chair-putting-away and the book-shelving, and not have to stress about keeping the library running on an ever shrinking amount of money…


That’s crazy talk!



Is your refrigerator running?
Better go chase it!
Oh shit! Thanks dude!


Well thank God someone thought of us office workers and the plague that is having to move our legs a little bit. Now if only the e-Chair can dump me into my e-Car, and then my e-Bed can gurney me into my house!