Panty hose stuffed with hair clippings works great on oil slicks

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Okay, we literally would spend an entire lecture discussing this rumor in a freshman bio class I taught, and this solution is a little outdated. (I mean come on, there are people with a bachelor’s degree who were born after this patent was awarded.)

The biggest problem with it is that panty hose and any other fine fabric mesh restricts the surface area of the hair and blocks access to the majority of hair, which instead (under large scale deployment) does soak up copious amounts of water, contrary to the claims made in the article. McCrory himself actually brought this up in a later patent.
A more effective solution, (says McCrory,) is increasing the surface area of the hair in contact with the oil by instead using a TWO-dimensional mat anchoring the ends of the strands, and laying that directly over the oil slick.

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