"Play nug-a-nug" and 30 other terms for sex from the last 600 years

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“Give someone a green gown” is actually one of the better known ones - it refers to acquiring grass stains on one’s undergarments from vigorous exercise while lying in the grass. "She has a green petticoat’ was Victorian for ‘she’s a slut’, and even into the 20th century green woman’s underwear remained unpopular.

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I like Fadoodling because it sounds so much like the modern term Canoodling that I had to see if there was a related etymology (my conclusion: no one knows)

Also, this list is missing snuggle-bunnies

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What about “snu snu”?

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Eight seconds in the Bantha rodeo

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I think “Put the Devil into Hell” must be much older than stated; it’s in the Decameron, i.e. 14th century.

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I wonder if that was the inspiration for ‘GreenSleeves’.
Hmm, WikiPedia says possibly.

Another one, though not so very charming, is to give someone “A punch in the beard”.

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This is as good a time as any to reveal one of my favorite things ever (warning, rest of comment very text-NSFW). I was idly browsing the Oxford English Dictionary, looking up dirty words (as you do with dictionaries), and I came upon the entry for “pussy”. One of the citations from 1865 was this:

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast i. 9 My poor pussy , rent and sore, Dreaded yet longed for one fuck more.

That’s sort-of fun, I thought. It’s a baudy little rhyme! I wondered if this book (“Love Feast”, by “Philocomus”) was cited anywhere else in the OED? Turns it, this single book is cited on basically every dirty word in the entire dictionary! And every citation is more awesome than the next.

For “fuck”:

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast i. 9 My poor pussy , rent and sore, Dreaded yet longed for one fuck more.

For “gamahuche” (“An act of fellatio or cunnilingus.”)

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast iii. 20 ‘I’m going to teach your velvety cartouch [sic] The art and mystery of the gamahuche.’

For "bumhole:

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast iv. 28 Thus he buggered and befrigged, Cunt filled, and bum-hole, too, well rigged.

For “pole”

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast iv. 27 He oil’d his long and rampant pole, And tried to thrust it in the hole.

“Cunt” has two of them!

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast iii. 21, I faint! I die! I spend! My cunt is sick! Suck me and fuck me!

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast ii. 15 'Tis said by some old Heathen droll There is 'twixt cunt and 'tother hole A slight partition only put Between the cunt-pipe and the gut.

For “meat”:

1865 ‘Philocomus’ Love Feast i. 3 Poor puss shall have a treat For the first time of juicy meat.

There are, in total, 24 citations of this book in the OED. CLEARLY IT’S THE GREATEST BOOK EVER WRITTEN!

My task, then, was clear: find this rare and elusive volume! I started searching libraries and online archives, trying to find a copy, but I couldn’t find anything. Finally, after a lot of googling, I discovered that there’s only one copy of this text still extant, and it’s owned by the Kinsey Institute library. It was targeted by famous prude Anthony Comstock for censorship, and almost all copies were destroyed. Note the year, 1865: it was part of a series of books meant to be sent to civil war soldiers on the front lines (those nights get awful lonely…). Bet you didn’t see that in the Ken Burns documentary!

Philocomus, whoever you were (one would assume that the pseudonym is fake-Latin for “love to cum”), you were a true poet!

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I was thinking the same thing, but that was in Italian. The first translation of the Decameron in english was only published in 1620. Even moreso, the tale of Alibech was left either untranslated, bowdlerized or even replaced in every english translation until 1930.

Still, the italian text was available before that, of course, and a complete french translation which included tale III.ix (Alibech’s story which includes this phrase) was apparently available earlier (it is strongly suspected Shakespeare read it, as some of his works show influences from Boccaccio.) So 1616 for this sentence to first appear in english is entirely plausible, possibly sourced from the decameron, possibly through a french source.

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Oh my, l LOVE number 20! Next time l want to get frisky with someone, that’s what l’m going to ask them: “would you care to join giblets with me?” It’s just so… rampantly sexy.

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Don’t forget to “stuff the bird.”

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“Taking the skinboat to tunatown.” Please blame the movie “Grumpy Old Men” for that.

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If you have to resort to aged idioms such as these, maybe you’re just not ready for poppop.

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i can think of tons that are missing, wait, is this a new bbs game?

I’ll get the ball rolling with:
“taking a trip to pound town”

(maybe this should be spawned off into a game thread so the comments don’t close.)

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Ahh, I was thinking that didn’t sound very healthy.

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130567_zpsd46697e7.jpg510×675 79.3 KB

It was reported that Zaphod Beeblebrox, whom she described as “the best bang since the Big One,” had delivered a presidential address from her bedroom on at least one occasion.

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I wanna hear Snoop Dog say this.

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