Porn played over Target store loudspeakers

[Read the post]

2 Likes

Melodramatic?

1 Like

When I was in the dorms my freshman year of college, the cable TV was wired serially from room to room.

So I put my favorite porn on the VCR, disconnected every room after ours from the normal cable feed, and connected them to my VCR. They only got channel 3, but at least the content was interesting.

After the furor in the hallways 10 minutes later I chickened out and put it back to normal.

15 Likes

Sometimes itā€™s not so much the porn, but oneā€™s taste in pornā€¦

7 Likes

Hey . . . sex sells.

6 Likes

Sounds like a typical in-store promotion to me. Anyone happen to check the latest arrivals on the DVD movie rack?

2 Likes

Hear that weeping? Thatā€™s the Baby Jesus. Porn makes him cry.

3 Likes

Ed: It means, thatā€™s pretty smug advice, coming from a man who mounted an eighteen year old checkout girl on the day-old bread rack.
Phi: Sheā€™s twenty - and shut up.
Ed: Let me get you hot, Phil: "I need a price. Register Nine, I need a priceā€¦
Phil: Cut it out!
Ed: What did you use for protection, paper or plastic?

5 Likes

Carry a gun - go ahead.
Hear porn - incredible panicā€¦

Definitely one of those ā€˜only in Americaā€™ things :slight_smile:

12 Likes

Why does the same clip loop multiple times in the video?

YouTube! Itā€™s like Vine, but lets you upload videos longer than 12 seconds.

3 Likes

Now do you people understand why porn should be seen and not heard?

1 Like

They evacuated the store?!

Gawd, that must have been hilarious.

10 Likes

So whatā€™s the current theory? Is it a disgruntled (former?) employee going to different stores and messing with things? Or some hax0r figured out how to pwn the Muzak?

Really? Itā€™s lewd noises, not anthrax,

5 Likes

The muzak (in the stores I do IT for) is piped in via a music player that plugs into the internet, the Intercomm/PA and the phone system. We donā€™t control whatā€™s played. Itā€™s a bit like SiriusXM or something, but really itā€™s a third-party company that we have manage the muzak to ā€œencourage the island lifestyleā€.

It could be nothing to do with Target. It could be entirely on a third party music-supplierā€™s head.

I guess the reason my company uses a third party service is for liability and licensing reasons relating to ASCAP and the RIAA, seeing as those two will sue you for something like playing the radio for a crowd without getting a performance license, which is utter bullshit.

2 Likes

Hey Target, were you faking it? Or was it realā€¦


ETA - Meanwhile Walmart is all like ā€œIā€™ll have what Targets having.ā€

1 Like

Tyler Durden.

1 Like

I looked up the model of our muzak player. Turns out it has a 3.5mm input and a USB port, and is designed to automatically start randomly playing any WAV files on a USB stick immediately if you plug one in while itā€™s in its normal playback mode. If thereā€™s a USB stick plugged into it, and itā€™s rebooted, then itā€™ll look for a firmware update.

What a primitive piece of tech. Itā€™s already $300 MSRP. But it can only handle 16-bit mono WAVs at 22050khz. What a piece of shit.

2 Likes