Practice making eye-contact with people

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/01/22/practice-making-eye-contact-wi.html

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Just great. I accidentally clicked on the video as I was scrolling down the page.

Now I live in fear of what YouTube is going to recommend.

(Of course, I have an 10 year old nephew who lives on YouTube when he visits, so my recommended list was already a shambles of Persona V videos, Undertale videos and funny pet videos.)

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Big Sis is watching you?

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Great video for introverted people who need to practice for keeping eye contact with women. Now to make the approach…

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Or people in general. I can keep eye contact with someone while they’re talking but find it really difficult when I’m talking.

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I find the music in this video reduces the sense of immediate presence. It gives a daydream quality that allows the mind to wander. Contrast this with ASMR style videos, where, by virtue of the audio, someone seems to be up in your personal space.

After a minute of watching her unprompted changes in expression, I’m reminded of animated characters in video games, going through their canned figdeting while they wait for you to perform some action.

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If you’re going to keep practicing, you need a better soundtrack. Try this one:

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Easy to keep eye contact when there’s no bewbs to distract you :wink:

Of course, she might not want to look you in the eye for the trouble you’ve caused her.

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a46m4Ly

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I actually went to a self-help seminar many, many years ago where one of the techniques they used to help folks build confidence was to stand in front of a complete stranger and just stare at each for as long as possible. It starts out with nervous giggles and laughter, and soon becomes… very emotional actually, to the point the woman I was standing in front of began crying, and then I began crying. In a weird way, you end up feeling so vulnerable just staring into another human being’s eyes. Very powerful, I recommend it. Not sure you’ll get the same effect from these videos, but can’t hurt to try.

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Me too, but I didn’t realize that until you wrote it out.

This will take my crazy-eye skills to the next level.

The fear is real. I accidentally let some random video that someone had linked me roll over to the next one and I got a bunch of misogynistic bullshit in my recommendations for several days. I have the same problem with Android’s newsreader. I keep tabs on right-leaning news outlets in order to have a more complete picture of how their primary readers see the world. That does not mean that I want articles from Newsmax or anything remotely approaching it in my newsfeed.

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That’s okay, most people are uncomfortable with constant, direct eye contact anyway. Anyway, the problem isn’t “you have to make eye contact.” There are a lot of circumstances in which it’s completely admissible and even normal for two people to talk without making substantive eye contact, we all do it every day without noticing it. The problem comes from when you specifically avoid eye contact. That’s something that a lot of people pick up on and interpret as having some kind of meaning.

Weird feels.

A few of the images in other comments show another part of the problem -
when facial expressions make the other person uncomfortable.

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