Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/11/23/prisoner-escapes-by-telling-ja.html
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I’m shouting at the video, “Poke him with the stick, dammit!”
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ok I need the money so I’ll let you escape, but we’ve got to come up with a believable story that doesn’t make me look like a dumbass!
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I have never met a cobra that wasn’t preternaturally pissed off.
If I were in a cell with a real cobra I’d be climbing the bars.
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Upon being told, “There’s a snake in [some place],” a person then voluntarily enters [that place]. This does not compute.
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There is a reason we couldn’t see Cobra even though it was right in front of us.
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Well, it was Thailand, so shame on the prisoner.
If it was Florida, shame on the guard.
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He deserves to be free after that
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But he had a stick! /s
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Did the suspect escape in a souped-up '69 Dodge Charger? Driven by his cousin?
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THERE IS A SNAKE COBRA IN MY BOOT CELL!
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I believe you but what’s the n in your sample?
Let me first start with this:
It is possible to show that the universe does not exist, because relative to the sheer size size of it, the actual physical matter does not take up a significant amount of space to make it to the end of the calculation do to significant figures. It’s not a good proof, but it’s a fun one. The minute amount of matter in the universe is significant to us.
1>n<10ish, n∧1
I once had a pissed off cobra follow me around a bus, quickly, and then pace back and forth against the closed doors. I have no idea what I did, I didn’t use the rest stop to relieve myself. I did look at the giant freakish ants with wicked stings.
The bus moves on, and I think I am safe. Down the road some, no more than a third of a mile, but more likely a tenth of a mile, the damn thing comes swerving up the dirt road and towards the little village restaurant/shop/abode. Lucky for me it had doors. My love at the time thought it was funny. “What did you do? It looks pissed. Mabey it found it’s true love and I should let it in.” Then I have to run for the bus and hope it doesn’t smell or see me.
That particular sample was particularly important to me, and may have colored future and past experiences.
Other cobras I have seen in person, some up close, were also ill tempered. Like velvet ants, some organisms, are just highstrug or permanently pissed off- from our perspective. Then again, wouldn’t you be around humans.
Perhaps I give off some sort of gas or pheromone that ticks cobras off.
(see Kids In The Hall sketch below)
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weird. there are no cobras near me, but the times i’ve come across rattlers they were pretty docile - if you heed the rattle they’ll let you back up
I went to a reptile house in India once. It would never work in the US with all those lawyers. If I had wanted to, I could have reached down and poked a 10ft alligator in the eye.
Anyways, the poisonous snake exhibit featured a guy poking a cobra repeatedly with a stick to get it good and raving fucking mad before they milked it for venom.
The rest of the deadly snakes they just kinda let wander around. It was a wild day.
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Rattlers- never a problem. Other native snakes, no problems. Respect nature and give it a wide berth when one can. I went hiking with my dad once, about a decade ago, and we moved a few baby rattlers off the trail with sticks we were on and thought that we were doing good work.
My grandmother, near 100 years old and weighs almost 20 less than that. She is a bit of a legend in the town where she has moved to. Beyond believing that nobody owns nopales, she sees all cacti as a community asset, she has been known to move snakes, including rattlesnakes off of the trails she walks on in the early morning so that they don’t get squished by mountain bikers or inane hikers. She just picks them up and moves them. Sometimes she laughs at the people that ask if she’s scared. “It’s too cold in the morning. What are they going to bite into anyway, skin and bone?”- my paraphrase of her Spanglish. (She has no qualms killing things. She pick up a chicken, swing it one handed and break its neck faster than it can blink.) I ran into a parent at a kids birthday who suddenly said, “I know your grandmother. I love her!” She also doesn’t flinch when the trains come whizzing by, but that is because she is nearly deaf.
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Thank Dog they used a large red circle to identify the main character in the video, otherwise everyone would of been oblivious to the actual content and miss the action 
There’s more security footage form this escape attempt.
I’ve had two rattlesnakes inside my house now, a hazard for my area. Mercifully though rattlesnakes are usually more defensive and slow … And they usually sound the rattle before they take any action. Don’t think I’d like to chance it with a cobra.
