Real Stuff: Swim Fin Job


Some paraphilias just make for better stories than others, I guess…

Although I will forever suspect Mr. Eichhorn could be using this as a clever parable to vent some truly horrifying personal sex work-related trauma. Probably involving fishes, harpoons or, at the very least, neoprene suits.

I remember swim fin guy. Boy, people would do anything if I gave 'em twenty bucks back in the day. Inflation’s really made a mess of things in so many ways.


Almost like an episode of The Magic Christian.

There was a guy in Vancouver (Canada) who was similarly known but for slightly different reasons. At least when I lived there in the 90s.

First off, he always called random{?} payphones downtown near the clubs. You’d be walking down the street and see a ringing phone. I assume most people answered the phone out of curiosity. Women who picked up always were hung up on so we’re only assuming it was him.

Second, once he had you on the phone, he’d offer you money to come over and beat him up. Really. He’d ask you about what you look like to and if you sounded too weak, he’d hang up. If you sounded good, he’d lay out what he’d pay for you to do.

When I first heard about this, I didn’t think it was serious until I saw the randomly ringing phones and talked to people who had talked to him. That’s how I came to know a lot of his details. One day I picked up the phone, talked to him and found out how for-real he was though I never met him.

Legendary Vancouver comic artist Colin Upton even did a story that riffed on this guy in his Big Thing comic called “Pay-phone”.

So, although this guy has his own specific thing. I’m sure most cities must have at least one, statistically speaking. Wonder who it is my new city now?


Talk about a flappy ending!


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