Reckoning for Abusers

He’s resigned,but still pulling the Gomeshi bullshit of “you normal people don’t understand S&M.”

We understand enough to know that if there isn’t informed, adult, consent from all parties, it’s assault, asshole. You’re the one who isn’t doing the S&M and kink crowd any favours by pretending to be one.


Yep. Read accounts of this before of folks in the S&M community talking about how dudes use it as a haven for rape. The victims* often second guess themselves after the encounter wondering if they were somehow unclear.

*Victims of all genders have reported this.


This is a sad end to the career of a really fantastic public servant.

The strong statement of support from his ex-wife is interesting. It appears that at some point he took up heavy drinking, and has had a personality change.

Sounds like the fall of a hypocritical shitheel who practiced the opposite of what he preached.

The one that works for him?

FTA: “His ex-wife, Jennifer Cunningham, a lobbyist and political strategist at the firm SKDKnickerbocker, currently serves as one of his political consultants.”

Doubtful. Alcohol is a disinhibitor. It reduces self-control. It doesn’t change underlying desire. If he has these desires and can’t moderate his drinking, it’s his reprehensibility not to drink.


Sure. You think he was an abuser during their several decades of marriage, and now she’s covering up for him for the consulting fees? I think it is far more likely that his behavior has changed, and from the statements of the four women alcohol is a prime suspect. That doesn’t let him off the hook or mean he should not remain in office.

Good grief, can you hear yourself? Alcoholism is a disease, one which is frequently connected with violent behavior, and is not easily shaken off, even by people with strong character. As we’ve known for decades.

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I think neither of us know.

A disease. Not an excuse. Addicts often try to use their addiction as a shield against taking responsibility, which helps neither them nor the other people they harm. No one shakes addiction off, or it wouldn’t be addiction. What they do is decide whether they’re going to take responsibility for their actions and get treatment, or do only one or neither. I hope he gets treatment. It makes no difference to his culpability for his actions.

And again, alcohol does not change a person’s personality; it can alter their behavior by reducing their self-control, which is still ultimately their responsibility.

He resigned while issuing a nopology, which is better than not resigning at all, but is not taking responsibility.


I agree with this, though not taking responsibility for the addiction is often yet another byproduct of it.

Obviously his behavior is reprehensible, and he couldn’t remain in the position. However, I think his career – even the recent career, where he has evidently been compartmentalizing – coupled with his wife’s statement suggests that the person he is now is not the person he always was.

I find the circumstances really sad, and stand by my evaluation of him as a public servant. This is a classic pyrrhic victory, one that will generate glee among Trump-supporters.

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I honestly don’t know, but I wonder what the use is in speculating on it. As a private citizen I hope he gets treatment, I really do, regardless of whether or not his ex-wife and current strategist is covering for him. But I think a lot of people aren’t going to be glad he compartmentalized. I think many will feel betrayed, especially the women he inspired the way he did the women he targeted before they survived sexual assault by him.

This is where we’re going to have to only half agree. Yes, Trumpkins will be gleeful. But there’s no victory here, Pyrrhic or otherwise, only holding leaders to the standard they demand of others and we should demand of them in return. That’s important, not just in acknowledging his resignation, but in acknowledging his hypocrisy. I think he knew what he was doing, even if he put a cowardly wall in his mind to avoid facing it himself.

In the end, people are stronger who hold their own accountable, and those who lack integrity will be their own undoing.

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The same could be said for the whole thread. There is a “good riddance to bad rubbish” feel to the thread title and some posts that put me off. When someone otherwise admirable falls like this, speculation helps reconcile the extremes of behavior in our own heads. It also helps give extra dimension to what is ultimately a cautionary tale about moral crusades and crusaders.

Several of my political heroes have been caught engaging in bad behavior, one (on whose campaign I worked) ended up in jail. Politics attracts flawed people, and while I don’t think their accomplishments excuse their actions, neither is it fair (or helpful for progress) to withdraw all credit for those accomplishments.


‘Gotcha,’ tweets Kellyanne Conway as Trump supporters revel in Schneiderman resignation

Apparently Donald Trump is the only man immune to allegations of sexual abuse.


It’s so disgusting to see all these conservatives do the victory dance now that Eric Schneiderman has been exposed as a sexual abuser (and subsequently resigned just hours later). Guys, your President and your party backed a guy KNOWN TO HAVE SEXUALLY ABUSED AT LEAST ONE MINOR even months after his actions were widely reported, stop pretending you have the high ground here.


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