Recruitment ad highlights Russian soldiers' post-victory Ukrainian real estate plans

Originally published at: Recruitment ad highlights Russian soldiers' post-victory Ukrainian real estate plans | Boing Boing


Joke’s on you, Ivan. By the time you’ve successfully conquered Ukraine, that nice little apartment you had your eye on is going to be a pile of scorched brick rubble, courtesy of your aviation and field artillery.

But I’m sure a successful annexation of Ukraine’s agricultural and mineral resources will eventually allow the boss to add another wing to the Dvorets Putina on Cape Idokopas.


For reference:

Tell us again how Ukraine is the fascist state, Vlad.


Didn’t work so well for invaders/colonizers coming from the other direction either.


Despite their plans, this is the usual real estate they get:


Tract housing, four walls and a roof over your head.

Is these a Russian version of this tune?


They’re really ignoring the main risk here: they thought that Ukraine would fold. They haven’t.
At this point, Ukraine will have to be reduced to rubble, and then some, before they tolerate Russia. There will be nothing left to rule by that point.
Russia’s fighting a costly battle for a prize that they’re damaging by the second. It’ll never be worth the price they pay for it.

They shelled the Russian speaking areas of Ukraine the hardest. If their goal was to move Ukraine into greater Russian influence, it backfired. My friend’s Russian-speaking grandmother refuses anything but Ukrainian now. She’s terrible at it.

Cynically: if Ukraine had folded the way they anticipated, it would have paid out. When it became clear that wouldn’t happen, the rational response would be to retreat and cut your losses. Instead, they’ve got to worry about saving face instead of saving lives.


Oof. How bad are things in Russia when the biggest dream you can promise your infantry risking their lives is an apartment. Nothing against apartment living, just doesn’t seem like a huge wartime recruitment incentive.


Sign up and claim your Ukrainian real estate. :sob:




Well, you know what they say - it’s location, location, location!


One of the soldiers wants to live in the centre of Kyiv, and the other fancies Odesa on the Black Sea. The implication is that victorious Russian soldiers will enjoy the spoils of war and live like kings in conquered Ukraine.


You know what they say in the modern warfighting environment, “Turn off your location, location, location.”


FFS, Russians, read your own Leo Tolstoy.

Spoiler: Six feet of land for a grave.


The problem is that what happens to Russian (or Soviet) autocrats that lose a war is that they get removed from power. Putin is amoral, but not an idiot, and he knows that. At this point he has little reason to fear that the Ukrainians or NATO will do anything to him. But his big fear is that the generals or the security apparatus will remove him from power for getting into a losing war. So he’ll keep spending lives hoping that the Russian people are willing to spill more blood than the West is willing to spend gold.

NB This little ad is probably propaganda, but it is somewhat effective.


Realistically, there’s going to be plenty of construction work once the mines are all cleared.


The average Russian soldier comes from poverty, as all the smart/middle-class/politically connected people avoid it via any means available, up to and including escaping to other countries. ~20% of Russians do not even have running water, outside of the cities two thirds (2/3) of Russians do not have indoor toilets. The median income is under US $8,000/year. 65% of Russians live in apartments, 4% in dormitories, and only 30% in private homes – mostly in the country where there are no apartments.

In combination, most Russian soldiers, who are predominantly poor and rural, dream about a warm, centrally heated apartment with running water and flush toilets. Those from the far north think that Odessa is a nice warm place – it’s roughly at the same parallel as the famously warm border between Oregon and Washington, the Michigan upper peninsula, and Fargo North Dakota. And, of course, the Russian soldiers are being lied to about what, if anything, they will receive should the Ukrainians lose their country again – anything not destroyed or still desirable will be snatched up by Russia’s wealthy elites for their own mega-dachas, private docks, and wealth extraction.


That’s like saying that only Canadians think that Florida is warm. Odesa is a summer resort and tourism was a big part of its economy before the war.


Latitude is not a good way compare climate in Europe to that of North America. Milan is further North than New York City.


Anecdotally, I have personally been to Odesa, and a little ways southeast down the coast. It’s warm in the summertime, and there’s a nice, little beach in the village of Balabanovka in front of the Laguna hotel.



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