Self-lubricating condom can withstand up to 1000 thrusts

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Well…that also depends on if its a weeknight or a weekend!!!

I mean sometimes it’s just more “involved”.

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“A little to the left…no back to the right…no dear that’s your own thumb!!”

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That sounds like an application for a modded Fitbit. At a leisurely stoke a second, that’s 16.7 minutes.

What happens at failure? Does it break down, snap or catch fire?

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A metronome would allow you to get a really, really good ballpark here without trying to count.

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Where exactly do you suggest placing such a modded monitoring device?

Also:

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Not “back, and to the left” ?

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I’m honestly curious how they got those numbers. Self-reporting would be, uh, dubious for multiple reasons.

“Dear, why are you counting?”
“For science!”

Monster%20Condom%2C%20Magnum%20Dong%20-%20Danny%20Devito%20in%20It's%20Always%20Sunny%20In%20Philidelphia

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30

It’s best to know these things beforehand.

It could be like the old school cellulose billiard balls that sometimes exploded when knocked too hard.

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“Do you smoke after sex?”
“I don’t know, I’ve never looked.”

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It would be easier to video record and review later.

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That’s only acceptable for magic spit. Which is a whole different thread!!!

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Literally!

igniting-a-passion-for-science.jpg1000×439 133 KB

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If there’s even a slight possibility, then it’s probably best to just NOT.

(Not to mention you never did say where such an adapted fitbit would be hypothetically worn.)

I can attempt to count manually, with no unintended irreparable consequences.

Tech is not always the answer to everything…

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I’m sure that there must be some kind of strap arrangement that could be adapted.

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Pun intended.

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A fit bit basically just counts bounces. It could probably be worn anywhere on either partner and get a close count. Seems like the waist of the thruster would be the obvious place though.

So yeah, tell him to keep his belt on. If you really had a maker flare… you know what, I’m not going there :wink:

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:wink:

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And this is wonderful news! Just in time for the SCOTUS to outlaw contraception so our country can get back to making babies as God Himself intended. Indiscriminately and with great abandon.

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