Shampoo king wants to become a "warlord" with a "quite sizable compound"

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Delusions of grandeur. Is that something that exists in the DSM or is it just a literary device?

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That takes finesse…

Well, yeah; shampoo has several quite sizeable compounds…

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Well, sometimes you need a little; sometimes you need a lot.

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Weirdly I have never heard of this guy.

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Naturally, they assume that when they do emerge, once their social inferiors have rebooted civilization, that their incredible finance-brains, their assault rifles, and their USBs full of BtC will allow them to command a harem and live a perpetual Frazetta-painting future.

I wonder if Haywood, being an aspiring post-apocalyptic warlord, would also like a “quite sizeable” harem.

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Ha Ha Lol GIF by Lucas and Friends by RV AppStudios

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The Warlord+bunch of numbers before he sold his business.

Untitled

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So he wants a couple dozen armed men willing to die for him?

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“Committed to family and culture…” …of a standard sheik or sultan, then.

When you live the warlord lifestyle, you and your progeny are always a target. “Maybe they’re born with it, maybe their dad is fucking cray-cray.”

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These guys all have the same fantasies and they are all completely delusional about their ability to survive a societal collapse. Why? Because not a single one of them ever makes any mention of agriculture. There’s a reason every civilization prior to industrialization was agrarian (ie. 100% focused on agriculture).

They all get their notions of survival from TV and movies. You can tell because they vastly, vastly underestimate how much people eat. Hollywood does the same. Every post-apocalypse story (looking at you, Walking Dead) has 50 or 100 people living in a compound with less food than four people eat in a month. Yet somehow they survive winters?

Before industrial civilization, it took basically every moment of free time we have to grow and hunt enough food to live. It is all consuming (pardon the pun).

If society really does collapse in the way these clowns fantasize, you know who is gonna survive? The farmers. Furthermore, if you don’t know how to can and preserve, you don’t make it past the first winter, Mr Warlord.

It ain’t gonna be a rootin’ tootin’ gunfight at the end of the world. It’s gonna be a slow grind into starvation for everyone who doesn’t know how to farm.

Good god, that’s the best single paragraph summary of this mindset I have ever seen. Whatever Rob gets paid, it’s not enough.

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wow. so that’s what “tEh MaStEr RaCe” has to offer?
call me nonplussed. :man_shrugging:t2:

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Well, now that you know, if you tell two friends, they’ll tell two friends. And so on, and so on, and so on.

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And small unit combat from Call of Duty. He’s not even budgeting for watch on, two watches off, to cover his MyPillowFort.

A survivable settlement is going to need a lot of farmers/herders with fields, an overseer class, etc. And he’ll need a much larger zone to cover them. (Protection is a feudal lord’s value-added. Straight bullying, and the serfs will leave, one way or another.)

A protective area outside the bunker for the farmers to retreat to, observation posts at the perimeter, patrols inside, scouting outside… Argh!

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Excited Season 6 GIF by The Office

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A castle and a walled village.

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So, like, the one thing that the military does.

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It’s so funny how these clowns get so much wrong when all they have to do is pick up any history book (seriously, almost any one will do) to see what a simpler and/or more primitive society looks like. We know exactly how to make it work because we went through that to get here. Yet these guys imagine some new way which clearly wouldn’t work, based on narcissistic power fantasies.

It’s also hilarious that these right wing nut jobs refuse to look at the other modern group that has made this work- hippie communes. Plenty of those still exist, they grow all their own food, and they work pretty well by most accounts. Or the Amish/Hutterite/Mennonite type communities. For all their issues with womens’ rights and such, they are at least doing a decent job of self sufficiency. No pillow forts, arsenals, or warlords required.

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Plus a border and mobile reaction force, and then teeth-to-tail, the people to maintain those people not in the fields.

Yeah, I think he’ll need more than 15 guys unless they plan to go out fighting over the last can of beans.

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