Snorkeler pries open the jaws of a crocodile "to get my head out"

Originally published at: Snorkeler pries open the jaws of a crocodile "to get my head out" | Boing Boing

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Doo de doo, reading the headlines…

Um, why?

“to get my head out”

Fair enough.

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“Australia is a savage hellscape” posts are getting pretty old, but JFC!!! where else can an accurate series of thoughts be “a shark is trying to bite my head off; nope, it’s a crocodile.”

australia GIF

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I’ll be by the pool.

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My father when he was a wee tacker used to be taken by his parents on caravan tours from Victoria all the way up into Queensland. He told me once that on a particularly hot day they stopped the car by a river and all went in for a refreshing swim in the estuarine water.

Being Victorians, they thought nothing of it at the time. It was only after they dried off that they wondered if that might not have been slightly unwise. So at the next town, they casually asked the guy at the petrol station if there were any crocs in that river.

“Oh, nah, mate. Not down there. Sharks ate’em all.”

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My earliest memories are doing just this, in a wooden caravan my folks borrowed off one of their parents. Every trip to the beach was prefaced by a discussion that the risk of shark attack was low. As a consequence I refused to go more than knee deep - if they had to keep saying it something was up.

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and the nice part is, if that fails to stop the sharks and crocodiles, the next time “knee deep” is much shallower water

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Nightmare fuel. Absolute nightmare fuel.

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The snorkeler did not pry the croc’s jaws open, not unless he carries a long crowbar when snorkeling. A croc’s bite is significantly stronger than any human’s limp noodle arms. It probably opened up for a better grip, and the guy pulled out at the right time.

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Watch out for the box jellyfish in that knee deep water.

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