Some important facts about the Tex-Mex nipple-shields for men


#1

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#2

Aaaw, snap, I thought that guys were finally getting the equivalent of fruit-leather edible panties. And I totally would get a pair of edible taco-flavored nipple shields for any suitable gentleman callers.


#3

#4

Well we used to go to Florida and get these weird sunburns, like the time the backs of my ears gut sunburned and scabbed over, or getting sunburned in the part of your hair. The one year, my nipples got sunburned, and then they started to crack, and when I'd go in the ocean the salt water would sting my nipples.


#5

I'm glad they come packages of six instead of the more atypical odd numbered count. However, a package of 3 nipple shields would be so Japanese.


#6

The pack of six is actually for sharing between two people.


#7

Hey man, nipple shields are funny until, after a run, you realize you've got bloody nipples. Okay?


#8

Did they taste like tacos?


#9

Or Martian


#10

Last thing you want is a nipple visible when you're sporting a collared shirt and tie, carrying a bucket, and picking your nose.


#11

The package reads: "Beauty Help for Men"

This is not Fashion. Fashion does not need help. Fashion is above help. Fashion is proud, noble, self-complete.

Help-fashion is more like a lifesaver to a drowning man, or a spacesuit to David Bowman -- that kind of thing. Useful, but graceless.

As for what the hell is in that package? I don't care to know.


#12

I would buy those. As I've gotten older, I've gained weight. As I moved to the South, I've found wearing T shirts under dress shirts sweat inducingly hot. That's a combination that leads to products like these. Or yoga pants recalls.


#13

Wooo dawggy! I am so there!


#14

How's this different from pasties?


#15

I approve of this message.


#16

The use of tortillas, avocado and chile and instead of pastry, swede and potato?


#17

tex-mex is fine, but i prefer cool ranch flavored nipple shields. smile

seriously though, okay i get the three sports icons, these prevent chafing, but "beauty help" and "for fashion" i don't get? are people wearing these like pasties?

anyone have translations for the Japanese text?

isn't that six sets, 12 total?


#18

Not to be confused with actual and useful nipple shields for troublesome latch: http://www.medelabreastfeedingus.com/tips-and-solutions/112/nipple-shields


#19

More masculine tassels.


#20

Braided wolf-mane ones.