That bar’s getting higher every day…
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I haven’t talked to my best friend from high school in a few years; he was in a downward spiral and was homeless the last I heard. That might make me sound like an asshole, and perhaps I am. It just got harder and harder to talk to him, because he was so bitter, largely because he realised he’d probably never find a girlfriend. He wasn’t a PUA or anything like that – he was acutely aware that if he showed interest in a woman she would find it creepy, so he didn’t try. He was just very unhappy to be in that situation.
Conversations like this make me think of that, because whenever someone like @Daniel suggests there might still be redeemable human beings living beyond the dome of Wokeness, everyone is eager to reiterate the principles of the dome, but no one wants to talk about the irradiated wretches. And that is a lot like how I used to talk to my friend; it was easy to give out platitudes like “but you are allowed to talk to women” or “it’s how you see yourself that matters” – and I did mean that stuff – but I also knew that from his point of view, practically speaking, it was kind of bullshit too.
The thing is, yes, smashing the patriarchy is ultimately the solution to his misery as much as anyone else’s. Like, in the year 2525 I mean. But right now, no one is campaigning for us to treat disturbingly awkward men better. I’m not sure that would even be a good idea; writing them off as roadkill may be the best we can do. And if they end up dropping into the PUA toilet, then it’s fair to condemn them for that. But sometimes the tenor of the discussion feelslike “well, this proves that they deserved the undeserved lifelong emotional torment that led them to this point”, and I think that’s a bad look for a Christian website like Boing Boing.
ETA oh wait I just checked and it turns out Boing Boing isn’t a Christian website. That actually makes more sense
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I enjoyed Love Plus (Konami, for Nintendo DS) for what it was: a time-management game. It had the redeemable qualities of teaching time management skills. Moreover, it aimed to simulate the experience of getting to know and work with others - on their terms.
This, on the other hand, is shit.
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incorrect. while it’s not always the most lucrative field, there’s actually an entire profession ( several really ) devoted to this task.
the big thing takeaway is most people aren’t ever ready for adult relationships, most people go through phases where no one of any gender wants to deal with them, and yet most people manage to stumble their way through without doing too much unintentional damage.
for everybody else, or really whenever you need a helping hand: seek therapy.
if you’re not ready to work on yourself, why should anybody else?
certainly pretending salvation is going to come through a pickup artist’s game won’t cut it.
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Yes and that is exactly my point. Maybe we should try to change these power dynamics instead of trying to patch the problems they cause. Is that so difficult to understand ?
Sure—all we have to do is end all sexual harassment and assault and also alter the biological realities that make it easier for men to force themselves on women than the other way around (and more likely to want to). And of course we also need to change the way society assigns value to women based on their sexual attractiveness over any other qualities.
So you just figure out how to make all that happen and you’re good to go with the unsolicited compliments, OK?
In the meantime you live in a world where stopping women you don’t know on the street to “compliment” their appearance is a creep move.
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So, we should ignore women’s right to be treated like human beings, because it’s hard for some dudes to do so?
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Didn’t you know? That’s why women exist!
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See? Men are the real victims here! QED
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Hard to say. It’s a normal occurrence for me. Starting at about age 12. I’d find it typical, but not pleasant. For the record I have never dated, hooked up, or continued a conversation with any man who has done this though a couple of them bothered me more when I thought about it later… especially the ones that happened with really old guys when I was a pre-teen.I think it’s a normal part of life, but not a pleasant one. Not abnormal enough to be creepy… the followers are creepy, when a car is there on one block say and then there AGAIN the next block… that shit gets creepy.
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I really wonder what is wrong with you.
Yes, I would like a world with less sexual harassment and assault and some countries already have a much lower level than the USA, so that is possible.
No, these are not “biological realities”.
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You only see it as “normal” because society has conditioned us to ‘just accept it,’ and continues to enable bad behavior via its complicity.
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Yeah I mean basically I’m saying I go every place I’ve ever been in my entire life with a sense of dread for when “that” is going to happen to me again and how much it will escalate before he lets me go. For the record this has included groping, being dragged into a public toilet, and thrust into the back of an elevator. Either I’m a magnet for this somehow and very unique among women or this is so regular that there’s no hope of it ever stopping in my lifetime. I’m pretty sure it’s the latter.
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I think that until the entire culture changes games like this can only have nil effect or a negative effect. The consequences for something like actual Grand Theft Auto are real and fast to come down on you, making the game a satisfying fantasy. A game like this could be a satisfying fantasy as well, but in reality you can get away with much more facing infrequent and often minor consequences. Against that backdrop of reality, it’s just another sad artifact of our lives and our futures.
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Oh, there’s always hope; do not go gentle into that shitty night.
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I suspect it’ll be a cold day in hell before anyone learns to be a better person as a result of advice given or sold by a ‘PUA’. That said, I appreciate @Daniel’s raising the question of whether this game is quite so atrocious as the original post implies, and his wider attempt to explore the issue of how we might talk to and educate its target audience. It’s a bit sad that the mere attempt to raise these issues is treated with the amount of righteous hostility evident in many (not all) of the posts here.
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The game where some guy paid some models to act out all the bad creepy choices with him so that gamers could learn which creepy choice would be the secret cheat code to get another human to sex them. So much wrong i can’t even unpack that shit…
i’d think someone made this for the gamer gate people if it wasn’t also such a shit game.
At least that was a game. Plus how can one put a price on the summer they almost saw some pixels at the radio shack at the mall…
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Sticking my oar in here, but just out of curiosity, who are you to speak for “women” as a single monolithic entity?
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If you’re a woman and enjoy being treated like a piece of meat to be conquered instead of a human being to be treated with respect, then I don’t know what to say. Enjoy second class citizenship, I guess.
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You don’t know what to say because you can’t actually answer my question.
But hey, go ahead, make a sweeping generalisation about a gender; that’s a great way to behave.
Everyone knows “women” are so alike that you can state universal truths that apply to the entire set. Right…?
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