Superweapons in the hyperpalatability wars

…I don’t see anything wrong with this. The execution will be lousy… But cut out ‘candy tippings’ and that is Michelin star territory.


All the Rest

If it says On A Stick, I just… Ah… I got things to do. Like solder something. Smothered is a code word for lazy. Familiar food isn’t bad, and 50% of cooking is evoking passionate memories. Pushing the culinary envelope for its own sake is dumb.

And lastly all my opinions are opinions. However @doctorow, when you want me to edit your food posts let me know.


BTW, the way you approach hyperpalatibility is:

1: small, fatty, umami
2. Clean, vegetative, sharp
3. (Since you have primed the pump) neutral, umami, fragrant
4. Not fragrant, assertive flavors, hot (temp)
5. Sweet and bitter

Done, you get a Michelin star.


Sweet and sour candied baby jesus on solder stick, @doctorow, let @japhroaig know. Let them know!

Thanks, those were all delightful. I think what I really liked is that they were professional and casual, curious more than critical, acknowledged excellence, and offered suggestions and replacements for a similar effect.


Thanks for conjuring that genie :]


Ha-ha, total amateur. I just read and cook a lot. You are probably a better cook than I am (or at least your grand mother is a better cook than me :D)

The single best food at the Minnesota state fair is the all you can drink milk. Other than at the state fair I maybe drink 12 ounces of liquid milk a year. At the state fair I always drink milk till I slosh when I walk. Why does that milk taste so good? It’s the most delicious milk in the world. I have learned to do that activity last though. 50 ounces of milk before you go on the tilt-a-whirl ends poorly.


Obviously don’t follow this advice if you are immuno compromised, sick, or have an infection… But 8% milkfat raw milk is like steroids. All the energy of an energy drink, no come down.


BTW, candycaps are mind blowing. Not just because they taste Just like maple, they aren’t fermentable. So there is an analogue sugar the cervesie doesn’t consume . god I love nature.

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Caramel Chocolate - Dipped Bacon Ice Cream Bar: Vanilla ice cream bar with a bacon and caramel-filled center, dipped in chocolate, rolled in bacon and drizzled with more caramel.

But… Huh… Err… Wait!!!.. Uh…

I really don’t have any objection to this other than packaging, really. Let’s drop flavor out of the equation, this is the perfect ice cream finger food.

Fucking hell, infuse the chocolate shell with bacon, leave the vanilla in tact, and you will make a million dollars. Don’t even say bacon, say double chocolate-maple.


As for spam burgers… I honestly think a spam musabi with pineapple, wasabi, and spicy mayo would convert 99% of people to Hawaiian food or sushi.

Put the spam, wasabi, pineapple and mayo in The center. Boom, Hawaiian burger.



Holy shit this is my best idea ever. Why did I share it!?

Gluten free, American made, sustainable, cheap, and mildly ethnic. Who wants to invest?



A dusting of paprika on the fries, maybe. Curry sauce as gravy is within the style; braised pork is pushing it a bit. (We’re more likely to use poutine as a side dish to a couple of stimés or Michigans.) Kimchi is an interesting thought, but I think we’d use it on the stimés as garnish instead.

But breaded curds? Breaded deep-fried curds? My Francophone compatriots would (quite rightly!) call that b’en fuqué, b’en dégueulasse.

Fresh curds that melt in the gravy - anything else is an abomination, including cheddar.


Call me Doctor Fraunken-steen.

While I agree with your point about cheddar, the curds melting in the gravy is a bug, not a feature. You want curd in your gravy? Emulsify it into your gravy!

The fry, gravy, and curd should be core, unadulterated, and flavorfully/texturallt seperate. Otherwise just throw it in a vita mix and call it soup (wait a tick… That sound pretty good…)

Cornmeal fried curd is unbelievable. And I can’t believe how many years it has been since I took that photo.


Even in this obvious diner version, all the elements retain their structure.

The presentation on this isn’t realistic, but it speaks volumes that people automatically intuit what I’m describing.

This is called a Vomit Box.

And you call me a monster–i am going to have to hunt down the creature who thought this was a good idea.


Sadly – really, this is one of those things I wish I could unlearn – a vomitorium is just an exit from a stadium, not a place to throw up.


Not just Fritos – Maple-Bacon Glazed Fritos.

And a maragarita!

Aiiii, yi-yi-yiiiiii … I am the drunken Maple-Bacon Glazed Frito Bandito …!

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Bloody. Suffering. Hell. All that sounds incredibly good! Except for the pickle icecream.

Must get me to the Minnesota State Fair one day very soon.

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