T**** Case Derail

Wow, that’s a sad development.

The initial respect stands. Sincerely.

Again, @beschizza can speak for himself, should he decide to do so; that’s twice now you have deigned to speak for someone who isn’t yourself - that doesn’t demonstrate “empathy,” but rather the exact opposite.

But like Tam already said, “Do you.”

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I edited the dismissive sounding part out b/c I didn’t agree with what I wrote, I genuinely care (like most decent people here) about the triggering of assault and rape victims and their trauma. Secondarily it interferes with the larger point I was trying to make, which I’m guessing factored into the author’s thinking.

Oh, so you edited your comment to be more sensitive, but still believe we should have to read the headline?

Excuse Me Reaction GIF by One Chicago

Again, if you’re okay with the headline, great. Others disagree, and there is no reason NOT to take it out of the headline, even if the description is in the story itself. People should be given the choice. Having a description of a violent assault in the headline does not give people the choice. It FORCES it upon them.

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There’s nothing wrong with offering an opinion on someone else’s intention.

Oh, ligit pissed here. “Game” used no so much sarcastically, but in the sense that @elk’s comment set a bar gate keeping about who can/can’t be offended and hurt by unexpected violent discriptions just scrolling feeds.

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You started this by dismissing other’s concerns, which are absolutely valid, first by invoking that you yourself were a victim, and was not bothered by it. Others ALSO noted that they were victims, and you just dismissed their concerns out of hand, in a very condescending way.

So, again, you’re entitled to your views, but you’ve been treating others as beneath contempt for having a differing view.

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Riley Keough Word GIF by A24

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Stop gas lighting; that isn’t what you did here.

First, you spoke as if you know exactly what Rob’s motivation was, then you spoke about how E. Jean Carroll would feel if she saw the heading… and all that was after telling some people here how wrong they are for objecting to the needlessly graphic description in the headline.

*edited to correct the victim’s name.

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I was duped into thinking that women are sisters, and always have each others’ backs.

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You still don’t see how what you wrote impacts anyone else here, huh? Maybe spend some time considering it instead of digging more. Telling people you’re thoughtful and empathetic doesn’t work nearly as well as listening to them.

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I apologize if I was hurtful. That certainly wasn’t the intent. Was I hurtful to you? Let me know if so, I’m listening.

What did you think about the secondary point I was trying to make re: rebranding trump?

Not so much directly, but I am unhappy to see how you have been disregarding people who obviously were already hurt by this, responding to them only as if they were being unfair to you. As for the secondary point, several of us already said before you chimed in, you can brand Trump as a rapist without casually triggering the people who don’t need the reminder.

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Mindy and others made a really valid point about the choice of title; everything after the colon is unnecessary.

It is also rather troublesome that all the alleged ‘empathy and respect’ seems to be directed at male presenting members.

:thinking:

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That is indeed a valid point. I’m guessing the author thought it was necessary (I’d say the same if it was a woman author). Let’s see if they edit it after seeing the comments.

So my own take wasn’t needed or welcomed b/c someone sort-of said that some other way? That’s not how this works thankfully. :blush:

Why do you so much HAVE to have the hurtful, painful, traumatic description of rape in the headline? Why is this a sticking point for you? Why do you need this here and why are you attacking people here? We already know who Donald Trump is, and hell, the man SAID it himself what he did…

You’re attacking people here who have been victims of sexual assault (also, hi, it can happen to gay male kids too), and I just don’t understand why you’re making victims defend themselves.

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That isn’t what Chenille said, and 15 comments in and you are still making this all about yourself, rather than the actual topic at hand.

Not cool.

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I wasn’t initially triggered by the headline. I’m usually safe from casually-dropped triggers because the circumstances of my own abuse were pretty uncommon - which makes it way too easy to pretend that I or any one else can just heal (or at least scar over) and move on.

After seeing this discussion I went back and re-read the headline, mentally substituted the words describing her specific trauma with what would have described mine. “Ruined the rest of my day” doesn’t cover it. “It fucked me up, hard, and is still fucking me up right now” gets a little closer. I’m aware of how privileged I am to be able to choose when, where, and in front of whom I revisit that trauma.

I honestly don’t know if more exposure to triggers like that would force me to adapt or force me off a bridge. I shouldn’t have to be strong to read BoingBoing.

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I wanted it made clear that the judge condemned trump as a rapist by the common definition of the term (not least because his motion tried to exploit his acquittal on a charge of rape) and quoting the judge made clear exactly why.

But the headline was an inappropriate place to put it for reasons ably detailed here, and I’m sorry I did that. It was a glib error of judgment and I’ll do my best to remember to put anything similar after appropriate warnings and only in contexts the reader can control.

The idea that visceral, triggering text accomplishes change has a fine but dead pedigree and the modern reality is that the surrounding media environment immediately collapses the author’s context. The people most affected by provocation are a) those who do you the honor of following your work in spite of the context imposed on it and b) people who relish being exposed by it in the first place. So my impulse to headline that quote was just bad news from pretty much every direction one might come at it.

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And you’ll change that headline too? Right?

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