Terrorise other beachgoers with the Beach Behemoth, a 12-foot beach ball

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2019/01/28/terrorise-other-beachgoers-wit.html

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Just get your self Rover from The Prisoner…

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I am not a number! I am a free man!

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I’m a little more concerned about this 7’9" beach dude kicking over my sandcastle.
beachball

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The 12 feet refers to half it’s circumference, not total height (sadly).

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If I had one of these I’d be sorely tempted to paint it white. That might explain…

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Wait, now beach dude’s only 4’11" and trying to kick over my sandcastle?

I like those odds, but damn you for making me do drunk math!

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This one is still more frightening:

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The total circumference of 24 ft would yield a diameter (height) of about 7.64 feet fully inflated, and the beach dude is about 7/10ths the as tall as the ball, which would put his height at about 5’4".

However, I suspect he is in fact a stock photo 'shopped into a picture of the ball.

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Do NOT taunt Happy Fun Ball… and that goes double for the 12 foot version.

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ok I want one for next halloween . i want to paint it to look like a rock . and put a heavy remote control car inside . and run from it in an indiana jones costume.

indiana jones costume = meh
indiana jones costume with remote control boulder = oh yeah baby, who would get some this halloween, if only they could get their boulder through the door . totally worth it.

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I used to work at a Mailboxes Etc around the holidays when I was off from school. The best part of the job was throwing around the enormous, 10’ long, 6’ diameter sacks of packing peanuts. I understand the allure of something huge and light. Of course those peanuts were more of an ecological disaster, but similar takeaway.

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image

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We agree on the diameter of the ball. I deducted some of the giant / non-giant’s height, though, by measuring from heels and eliminating some hair-only height.

My point? My point is damn you again for making me do drunk math a second time!

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Something tells me these guys are not so good at math. The Amazon page also says “with an astounding 659,000 cubic inch volume”. If you do the math, that would only be true if the diameter is 9 ft and half the circumference is 14 ft. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

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If half the circumference really is 12 feet, then the volume would be a little over 400,000 cubic inches.

The decision to call it a 12-foot ball and bury the fact that they measured “pole to pole” in the details strikes me as intentionally misleading, since they had to know people would assume height. Still a damn big beach ball though.

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Okay that is the only time I have ever laughed at a tag.

Katamari dumbassery would have also been accepted

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Came here to make this point, and was not disappointed to see your comment. :slight_smile:

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