So, basically, this couldn’t’ve happened to a nicer pararsehole?
4 Likes
Parallel definitions by those parameters.
7 Likes
Like paratroopers. Just floatin on in, fresh as a daisy, while all the dogfaces have been humping through mud and snow for weeks.
4 Likes
The Secretary has disavowed him.
4 Likes
I bought a parakeet and the pet shop wouldn’t take it back when I realised my mistake.
4 Likes
An agent so secret not even the agency knows about him.
10 Likes
It strikes me as a nice irony that the company that makes its money by misleading the gullible in the interests of its advertisers and its owner proves to be just as gullible itself, perhaps because every day employees of Fox News have to spout garbage as if they believe it, and are not longer capable of telling the difference between truth and falsehood.
4 Likes
It’s well documented that if someone believes in one conspiracy theory, they’re very likely to believe in other conspiracy theories, as well as conspiracy theories that directly contradict the main one they hold. I’m pretty sure this carries over to regular cognitive biases as well.
6 Likes
Awesomely deep cover. Perhaps this is the truth about Snowden; he is the CIA’s deepest mole, hiding in plain sight in Russia till he gets enough clearance to bug the Kremlin (or Putin’s dacha, which is likely to be far more useful.)
1 Like
You aren’t missing much. My keet is a real asshole. I think you’re better of with a parakeet. Or failing that, a psuedokeet.
6 Likes
Seriously though? I don’t understand why people keep parakeets as pets. They shriek at high pitch that’s deafeningly loud about twice a minute all day. I don’t care how pretty that bird is. I’d rather take a powerdrill to my ears than own one.
I guess it’s like the low battery warning on smoke detectors. People illogically get used to what amounts to acoustic violence astoundingly quickly.
2 Likes
It’s a Constitutional Representative Democratic Republic! 
A dyskeet? I once owned one, it was horrible! I threw it out and it became a exokeet and met others. You cannot imagine my horror when they came back as multikeet!
3 Likes
Odd - mine sing (I have 5 of them).
I play the radio for them and they sing along with in - they have moments but if they get too loud I cover the cage - makes them quiet down - it’s like timeout for a toddler.
The singing though is very pleasant.
2 Likes
In this case, “para” is part of a portmanteau of parachute and trooper.
/still not awake enough to be funny
1 Like
Guess they couldn’t go with troochuters.
3 Likes
OT: Bizarrely, there is now a wild population in South London, presumably escaped from zoos or released by owners who can’t take the noise any more. They survive the winters by roosting near heating vents.
3 Likes
Survival rate of paratroopers is extremely low. About as good as balloon based artillery officers in WW1, and for a similar reason.
1 Like
Now? I vaguely remember (from my days as a YOC member) that they became a resident population in London during the 1970s. Wikipedia isn’t helping though, it just says “The European populations became established during the mid-to-late 20th century”
2 Likes
