Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/06/12/the-baobabs-are-dying.html
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Correlation is not causation. I think we should wait until the baobabs are extinct before commencing an investigation, and only once that is complete should we advance any hypotheses about the cause.
/s … is that really needed?
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I like the cut of your jib!
But, look man, you’ve go to think bigger . Who knows how long it will take for the rest of those things to die off, we could be waiting five, maybe ten years. We’re busy people. No, waiting is out. What we need to do is get in there and cut down the rest of the trees, get our answers and get on with our lives.
I’ll get the planning under… hey… who let in the little orange guy with the mustache? Oh my god, he’s got a gun! Security! Sec…(gurgle)
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I don’t know anything about their methods, but that would worry me. You know, the “We probed a bunch of old and important trees, and they all seemed to die” bit.
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I never use it at the risk of thick people on the internet thinking I’m a real asshole, which I am more than happy to take.
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According to a statement from the Whitehouse, “There is a special place in hell for very dishonest and weak, bad faith Baobabs. They didn’t die under Criminal Obama, and are just trying to make POTUS look bad. Sad. #saynoto globalwarming #whoneedsweakpolarbearsanyway”
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Now I know where Pruitt will get te wood for his custom conference table.
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“I’m sorry, we can’t sign the new Paris Accord on Global Warming as we’re all out of Panda Blood for the pens.”
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a news item arose last year about a million pound yacht that was being moved across french land was said to have been halted so the trees that were in the way were cut down …thank you
guessed it got political because the news suddenly disappeared
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You’re not from Sheffield Council by any chance, are you?
(ETA: Brits will know. The rest of you have a gazillion search results to choose from. Just add ‘trees’ to ‘sheffield council’)
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No, just Sheffield Council adjacent. I’ve never seen a grove of trees that doesn’t look like a parking lot waiting to happen.
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I guess those roses are tougher than the Prince realized …
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They’re the whitest of bears, I thought there’d be at least one group out to save them…
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Someone just exercised their right to be forgotten.
If the study’s sampling techniques killed the trees, it wouldn’t be the first time such a thing has happened. Baobabs are legendarily hard to kill, according to The Fine Article, but die from the inside out, which suggests that dating them via core sample would be very risky.
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From the photo: Adansonia grandidieri (Native to Madagascar).
From the Article:
All were in southern Africa – Zimbabwe, Namibia, South Africa, Botswana, and Zambia.
So that would be Adansonia digitata.
Looks more like this in case anyone cares (Still a very cool tree): 
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Came here to rant because not only the effing guardian, but also our @beschizza uses stock photography from Madagascar with the story of dying Adansonia digitata.
Thanks.
Just FTR, haven’t been to the Allee des Baobabs, but according to a friend who has, the adult ones you see in this picture - and all the other pictures, from different angles - are pretty much the only ones left at this spot, as well.
Such a shame.
Baobabs (and some other Malagasy stem and hypocotyl succulents) were the reason I became a botanist.
If they die, I will die on the inside.
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Wasn’t this a plot point in Philip Pullman’s The Amber Spyglass?
The solution in that case was to get two teenagers to make out. Hmm.
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