THE BUREAU: Part Six, The History of Telepathic Infant-Based Mind Control of U.S. Presidents


#1

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/12/05/the-bureau-part-six-the-hist.html

From the weekly series The Bureau. Brought to you this week by the U.S. House of Representatives and InjectoCortex, Proud provider of INF-based Brain Transistors for Elected Officials (IBTEOs) since public disclosure of their existence in 1952.


#2

History of… what? Infant-based mind control? Can’t be that much history to it. Didn’t it start January of 2016?


#3

No one thus far has managed to keep that infant-minded President under control.


#4

I was referring to Trump’s control (as in lack thereof), but I see your point!!

:slight_smile:


#5

To have a little fun here:

It depends on your definition of ‘Start’. While the current iteration of ORPI-Based Mind Control did begin at the date you indicate, there’s a long history of psychic-based influence of U.S. Presidents. George Washington rather famously heard his initial instructions from a preternatural overtalkative Cherry Tree, which he axed to pieces in a foolish reaction of childish protest, only to have pieces of the mind-controlling tree placed in his mouth as wooden dentures.

To speak with historic certainty, Millard Fillmore was the first U.S. President to have an infant’s brain directly assigned to him, though it’s been long suggested that Thomas Jefferson started the idea. Jefferson’s mind control employ was still during the Psychic Sapling era that plagued Washington during the foundation of our government, and Jefferson was forced to hear his messages from a small Green Hawthorn, which he found insulting.

Jefferson’s phrase “I can not live without books” comes from his tendency to pulp as many psychic trees as possible, such was his fierce sense of independence. It was Jefferson’s urging that the government find an alternative to tree-based Mind Control, establishing the Fair-Infant Proviso Act of 1804 which sought to find suitable use for Infant Minds in government.

The development of electronic telepathy itself is more complicated, especially when you add in use of electricity as an amplifier, much of which is addressed in video segments indicated here, particularly on development of the INF-series of transistor based receivers.

But to your original point of “Didn’t it start January of 2016?” - Yes, you are correct. The original phrase at the end of the Constitution (which has been removed from historic record) was “So ratifying the Same, for it will always be January 2016 somewhere” - Time has diluted its meaning, but loosely interpreted the phrase means: Infant Mind Control of U.S. Presidents has been with us for some time, and will be for many years forward.

It’s just the way the world goes.


#6

It makes me very happy that this project exists. :slight_smile:


#7

Thank you in return for the kind comment, @NickyG!

More on the Infant Brain next week. They’re quite a menace.


#8

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