The Republican House of Horrors


#1

[Read the post]


#2

I feel like in this election, Clinton is the moderate conservative. She seems to have more in common with Stephen Harper than Bernie Sanders.


#3

I used to be a registered Republican. I cannot imagine why anyone still is. It is horrifying.


#4

It’s horrifying because it’s true!

It’s horrifying because it’s true!

Someone please make the horror stop so I don’t have to hide behind the sofa anymore!


#5

I’ve gotta say this is the best part–Cruz smacking Trump for expressing an opinion they both agree on.


#6

So they’re going to allow guns at the convention? Perhaps someone should start marketing silver ammunition to them.


#7

Pair up solid silver (plated) ammo with gold bug neocon fiat currency gobltyguck and you have a solid business there my friend! The Uber of ammo! Delivered by amazon drones! What could possibly go wrong?

Quick let’s get this incorporated in the Bahamas asap.


#8

Good for both werewolf Republicans and cybermen!


#9

There’s an old story of a priest that, when rifling first was a thing, wanted to prove that it was the devil’s work so had twenty rounds of normal ammo fired, then had twenty rounds of silver ammo blessed by him and inscribed with the cross fired.

Turns out silver makes poor ammo because it doens’t take to the rifling the way lead does.


#10

Did he try and drown the gun afterwards?


#11

Doubtful. I do commend the man for trying to be ‘scientific’ about it. IE same gun, same location/weather. The problem is drawing the wrong conclusion from the results.


#12

He probably invalidated his data by taking confession from the gun on a Sunday.


#13

Silver is a lot harder than lead. But at the distance at which you are going to shoot at werewolves it’s probably immaterial.
True story; some people I knew moved into an old house in Cambridgeshire. Under a floorboard they found a bag full of 3d pieces (very small silver coins). They asked around the village and were told that they were not that uncommon, they were for making anti-witch, vampire and werewolf cartridges for a shotgun. There were also three rowan trees in the garden, also for anti-vampire use.

Perhaps there’s a business opportunity here, protected by Second Amendment rights.


#14

Abe Lincoln would be proud.


#15

I can. It is actually financially and socially beneficial to an awful lot of people, just as being a Communist Party member in the Soviet Union used to be.


#16

I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again:

If Abraham Lincoln was alive today he’d be desperately clawing at the inside of his coffin.


#17

Considering his body got stolen so often they put the casket under something like eight feet of cement…


#18

Technically I think there was just one attempted theft which failed spectacularly, but the corpse was secretly shuffled around a couple of times in an effort to foil any future attempts.


#19

I’m envisioning a game of 3 Coffin Monte.

All right, folks. Here we have the genuine, bonafide corpse of our dear, late president. Abraham Lincoln.

Now we put President Lincoln in this middle coffin. THUMP And we close the lid. Wump and now we shuffle the coffins. Shuffle, Shuffle Shuffle

Keep your eye on the coffin as we move them around. Can you keep track of our 16th president? Will put down a sowbuck on the fact that you can keep track of the great emancipator?


#20

You almost owed me a new monitor. I came close to spitting my coffee out in laughter after reading that.