There is no shocking thing in this trailer for the new Guillermo del Toro movie

I’m a simple man. I see Willem Dafoe, I press play.

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Now explain Cronos.

That film — the look, the acting, the noir of it — are so damn good, that I wonder how anyone could whip up the audacity to remake it, except as substandard adaptation weighed down with eye-candy because – heck! – we gots the tools.

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So, that was not my thesis, just a video essay I appreciated, and it’s been a long-ass time since I watched Cronos, but I guess the businessman Dieter is the real monster? And the protagonist who is transformed into a vampire by the device is the sympathetic “monster”? Maybe Pearlman’s character can be mapped to the protagonist in the other examples? Idk I’m a little drunk right now due to circumstances but whatever. Why do I have to explain it?

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They have the audacity to ruin anything they please.

See The Vanishing or Nikita for excellent examples.

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Or Les Diaboliques or Insomnia. But that’s not a fair comparison because those are are all straight up remakes of foreign films, and Del Toro is re-adapting a novel. Give him a chance, he’s a fantastic director!

Oh no, I love Del Toro! The Devil’s Backbone is one of my favorite movies.

Patton Oswalt Marvel GIF by ABC Network

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I get defensive, sorry! You are obviously a person of intelligence and taste.

I should add that while the American The Vanishing is terrible (even through it was directed by the same guy as the original), the Hong Kong remake of Nikita (Black Cat) kicks ass.

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… But you haven’t seen it.

That in no way resembles film noir for me, so it’s hard no, for me.

Would you see it if it wasn’t described by others as film noir?

Or do you exclusively watch film noir films?

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