Things I Miss: My friend Bob trying to convince people to try his Flowbee

Originally published at:


weird would not even begin to describe that.


But one day near Salinas, you let him slip away.


Simi Valley, iirc.


No shit.


I’ve gotten haircuts at parties. Scissor cuts by buzzed hairstylists, not from a Flowbee. I’d be down to try one though.

1 Like

I had a haircutter once who finished up by running a ShopVac over me. I wonder why they don’t all do that.


An ex’s father used a flowbee to cut his own hair. Granted he kept his hair pretty short and could’ve just used clippers but i presume he was interested in the easy cleanup. Made sense. Can’t see the flowbee being practical for any other haircut.

1 Like

I got a haircut at a party once, many years ago.

me: "man, I need a haircut"
some guy: "I’ll cut your hair."
me: "really? You know how to cut hair?"
sg: “yeah, sure, sit down, somebody give me a scissors.”
<five minutes later>
sg: "oops"
me: "what? You said ‘oops!’"
sg: "I’m not sure what to do now!"
me: "you said you knew how to cut hair!"
sg: “yeah, but I always wanted to try it, and if I said I didn’t know how, you wouldn’t have let me.”

I started to get upset but then I remembered that was exactly how I learned to ride motorcycles. So kind of a great wheel of karma thing.


With vacuum powered razor sharp blades, this goes in the same box as lawn darts.

1 Like

I miss lawn darts…


I love Things I Miss. Also? I love how terrible this commercial is - with the vacuum cleaner running at full volume in the background and exactly ONE LADY in it.

I kind of miss them too. They were fun. I totally get why they went away, but hell, I miss the back seats in Subaru Brats as well.


Have you ever heard of the Chicken Tax? Apparently that’s why the Subaru Brat had those weird plastic seats - it was to make the truck into a sedan (and this didn’t fly, btw) for tariff reasons. Planet Money did a great podcast about it:

These actually work pretty well for grooming a dog.

My back deck was at one point the premiere place to get a mohawk. Mostly because we had proper barber’s scissors and clippers hanging around.I did get some haircuts by idiot friends during those parties. But I never let anyone go near me with clippers. I spent too much time straightening out the heinously crooked mohawks they were giving out.


Luckily, lawn darts miss me.


I can’t think of any other haircut you’d do yourself besides one that’s either very short or very long. Either way, there’s bound to be a lot of hair coming off, unless this is something you do weekly or more frequently.

I’ve given myself at least eight mohawks :slight_smile: and I have worn a mohawk cut by a pre-teen girl* several times. The “fauxhawk” (like a mohawk, but with just enough hair outside the roach to prevent head sunburn) is a favorite style of mine.

*The haircut I got at the party was worse, but not by much!

1 Like