TOM THE DANCING BUG - You Don't Want Your Christmas Party to Go Like This

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When I was in second grade my teacher wrote a play about Darth Vader cutting off Santa’s beard–the source of all Santa’s magical powers–with his light saber. Luke Skywalker swoops in and saves the day by making Santa’s deliveries in his X-Wing fighter.

Aside from calling it a Christmas play it was about as secular as could be. Little did we know then that we were on the vanguard of godless heathenism that would, decades later, threaten to destroy the country.

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Please tell me there is a video of this somewhere.

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That play sounds better than the actual Star Wars Holiday Special…

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Can’t wait to put on my new solstice sarong!

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I wish there was, if only to capture R2-D2, who was the smallest girl in the class in a cardboard box covered with aluminum foil and wearing a Tupperware bowl on her head. On the other hand C-3PO (me, Halloween costume) missing his cue is thankfully lost.

This was before videocameras became commonplace. It was the Christmas after Star Wars came out, in fact, and our teacher wrote the play to prove how “with it” she was.

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This strip is totally unrealistic, and unfair:

No on-air personality associated with Fox News would ever be caught dead taking public transportation.

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I think you mean Communist Transportation.

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Wow. That was christmas 1978, then? Your teacher really was ‘with it’.
And kids, we’re talking about the first Star Wars movie. Which is part one.

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Now I feel guilty for being sarcastic about the play being her way of showing us she was ‘with it’. The truth is, while it was a fun break from our regular schoolwork, she was the sort of teacher who made the regular schoolwork fun. She made learning exciting. She also encouraged us to think critically. We had a lengthy discussion about what a “bad word” was, and whether words could be “bad”, which was pretty heady stuff for kids our age.

I wish she were still around. This comic stuck a very deep nerve with me because I think she’s the sort of teacher who would risk getting in trouble to call out the “War on Christmas” as the BS it is.

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Tom, I mean Reuben, I mean Ken, I love your work. One (hopefully) constructive criticism: PLEASE handletter the strip. Using Photoshop or whatever for the lettering really takes away from the beauty. Just my opinion. Thanks.

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