TSA confirms miniature magic warhammers not OK on planes

Found out a few years ago light sabers cannot be carried on planes. Possibly use of the force may interfere with landing and take off procedures.

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Sense of humor is nice and unexpected, but doesn’t excuse the “symbols of things are real things” craziness. How did this ever become a thing? Why is it still a thing?

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While I like the reply shows that there is at least one human over there, the whole thing is still stupid.

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source

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Can also confirm that if you tour the Louisville Slugger factory in Kentucky (fun tour BTW!), you are also not allowed to take on the souvenir bat they give you. It has to be checked, even though it’s a little over a foot long. I imagine if you’re a master of a stickfighting martial art, you’d do some damage, but it’s no more dangerous than beating someone with a laptop.

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Don’t give them…

Oh, too late.

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Back in my teenage punk years my friends and I would hide those bats up the sleeves of our leather jackets. Used for warding off over-aggressive skinheads.

Maybe not enough to knock somebody out, but can definitely be enough to get what you want.

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I bet they wouldn’t have treated Alliance gear this way.

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And thank you for your service in warding off skinheads. We need more of that.

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More stories of when I’ve gotten on trouble taking things on airplanes.

Last time I went to India was a few years ago. I bought a bunch of touristy crap, because when I’m stuck somewhere it’s the perfect time to get ahead on my Christmas shopping for the family.

For my little brother (with whom I have a big, useless gift war with) I bought what they told me was a “Yogic Healing Wand”. It’s obviously bullshit, but it’s a giant fucking wand made of marble, quartz and has a big crystal on the end. It was ridiculous and more suited to D&D, frankly. Here, I found a photo of the big bastard:

On my way back I stopped for a few days in Germany, and on my way out of Frankfurt I’d repacked, so it was in my carryon. Some German TSA fellows take me aside to search my bag, and take the wand off where they speak about it out of earshot–not that I speak more than a few words in German anyways. One gentleman smacks the ball end into the palm of his hand to demonstrate how clubby it is, and the other takes it and makes stabby motions with the crystal end to demonstrate how stabby it is. He comes back and says very plainly, “You cannot take zis on ze plane.”

Anyways, into checked baggage it went to arrive home, alas, in 2 pieces. I glued it back together, and my brother I presume does nothing with it, because it’s giant and useless. But he’s pleased with this ongoing gift war.

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The folks who run TSA’s Instagram and Ask TSA are usually actually pretty amusing. TSA Instagram is fun just for the weird shit that people try to bring on planes.

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They forgot to note that if it’s a Li-Ion battery in there it has to stay home because those cannot go in checked luggage (this would likely qualify as a “portable recharger”).

https://www.faa.gov/about/initiatives/hazmat_safety/more_info/?hazmat=7

Well at least it looks neat, like as a decorative object.

Years ago I stopped into a new agey shop with a friend to look at the swords on the wall. A lady was in there buying polished rocks for all sorts of ailments.

When we left the shop, me limping in chronic pain, I was like, “Shit, I don’t need all these drugs, just a bag of magic rocks.”

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I had that exact scenario:

  1. Flying from SEA to SBP: 2x2x14 block of hard wood. Perfectly fine to be in carry on
  2. A week later flying back after using my Dad’s lathe to turn that block of wood into a light saber hilt. Must be checked as it is now a weapon.

SMH

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If Thor was on a flight and managed to bring Mjolnir into the cabin (who would tell him no?) what would happen if he was instructed to place his Hammer of the Gods into the overhead bin or underneath the seat in front of him (and he decided to comply)? Would the plane be pinned to the ground? How do magic hammers work?

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Exactly. This is like some unnecessary, Kafka-esque, govt stooge writing “Have a nice day!” on a ridiculous, onerous citation for bureaucratic offenses.

The fact they have a sense of humor does nothing that they’re enforcing sham, security theater at a cost of billions of dollars per year. Terrorists with boxcutters are now being used to justify the reason you cant bring a plastic facsimile of a magical hammer onto a plane.

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Because kids get shot for squirt guns. And that’s out on the streets. An airplane is a metal sky tube full of idiots.

Thor has flown in a quinjet lots of times without personally holding Mjolnir, so I assume an airplane would be fine.

ETA: Though I suppose it is possible quinjets are more worthy than civilian airplanes.

I don’t think it counts as “wielding.”

George Carlin on Airport Security: