Watch: Panicked family trying to shoo bat out of kitchen would make a great sitcom scene

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2017/09/05/watch-panicked-family-trying.html

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The dad’s the kind of person who would film horizontally.

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It’s been done: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3po2ER3jxnI

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Bat and dog stayed pretty chill considering Mr. Vertical Video raving like a coked-up sports caster.

Anyway, I only heard one panicked person.

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The little kid behind the camera has a very grave voice.

Ah, the wit and wisdom of the Irish… and they are definitely from somewhere around where my dear departed Mum grew up (County Cork or very nearby), judging by the accent.

Her nephew chatted to my son at her funeral - the look of befuddlement on my boy’s face was a picture, pretty sure he was only getting about one word in 5 (full on Cork accent not so easily deciphered by someone who grew up south of London :grin:)

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I’ve probably mentioned this elsewhere, but in the UK it is illegal to upset bats* (I totally agree with this, they are delightful creatures.) Someone I knew bought a house and the survey did not reveal bats in the attic. They entered the attic to investigate and the son of the house got bitten by a bat. Worse than the visit to A&E was the police telling them they could be prosecuted for interfering with bats.

It doesn’t want to be stuck in a room with someone capable of videoing in vertical format**
Open the windows, turn the lights out. let the bat get on with it.

*We are after all the country where there was a DEFRA helpline to advise farmers on how to deal with foxes. It was closed when it was discovered that 90% of the calls were from people who had urban foxes in the garden and wanted to know what they liked to eat.
**Look, it should be possible for Apple to have a big notice come up saying “Turn the phone 90 degrees clockwise, numskull”.

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Why does this make me think of Grey Gardens… more specifically the Documentary Now spoof of it, “Sandy Passages”.

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That is absolutely terrifying. I often awake in a cold sweat after having a nightmare in vertical video format. I can only relax by opening my two, side-by-side eyes and observing that I continue to live in a world that is generally wider than it is tall. The bat thing is kind-of amusing, but they should really just leave it the fuck alone until they get some help with their video formatting, at least.

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His panic was delicious, wasn’t it?

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I’ve had bats inside the house before. First thing stop being so god damn loud. Shut the eff up. Second. Get a damn net. Third. Declutter that house ya bunch of hoarders!!!

needs more yakity yak sax

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Hah - this was me while house sitting in BC (Canada) 3 weeks ago. The bat flew into my son’s room and chaos ensued.

I’m not ashamed to admit I was terrified the little bat would bite me as I chased it with a ball cap and piece of cardboard (while the family listened in on my horrors through the closed door).

Finally - we both tired to a point the bat allowed his capture and subsequent release. Beer was consumed shortly thereafter.

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“Baby is a cool machine
She moves to the pulse of a generator
She says damn that sex supreme
She says, she says damn that horror bat
Sex horror sex bat sex horror sex vampire
Sex bat horror vampire sex
Cool machine
Horror bat. Bite!
Cool Machine. Bite!
Sex vampire. Bite!”

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I’m glad someone else remembered that scene from that movie.

I’ve caught bats in the house before. It’s no big deal. Dress for the occasion, wait for it to settle and sleep. Slide a container up against the ceiling, trapping it. Gently slide the lid between the ceiling and the container opening, take it outside, close the door, let it go. Job done.

Screaming like a banshee and trying to catch something with sonar in a towel won’t work.

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I found it mildly obnoxious, but I can’t say Carla didn’t warn us in the headline.

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Link dead :frowning:

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I had a bat in my bedroom once, pretty freaky. It flew round and round in circles at a crazy speed. The solution was simple. Open the window as wide as possible, close the door and let the bat find its own way out.

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