Watch Tucker Carlson's bizarre Friday the 13th monologue about Patriotic Optimism

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"As I went walking I saw a sign there
And on the sign it said “No Trespassing”
But on the other side it didn’t say nothing
That side was made for you and me

In the shadow of the steeple I saw my people
By the relief office I seen my people
As they stood there hungry, I stood there asking
Is this land made for you and me?

Nobody living can ever stop me
As I go walking that freedom highway
Nobody living can ever make me turn back
This land was made for you and me"


Well, sure, if you’re the talentless heir to a frozen dinner fortune who grew up with a silver spoon in his mouth and then lied and BSed and hatemongered your way into a cushy job with a right-wing propaganda outlet, of course you’d think the U.S. is a wonderful place.

“You’ll feel things you inherited from your ancestors coming from places the modern world cannot touch”

Is he talking about rapacious colonists? His stepmother’s family? Both?

Additional reading: Tucker Carlson’s war on the ruling class is a master class of misdirection [Parker Molloy / Media Matters]

Worth reading. Sooner or later, Tucker is going to go full Elders of Zion.


That’s Tucker Swanson McNear Carlson


Man of the [white Christian Real American™] People. Son of an ambassador and former head of two public broadcasting agencies, step-son of the heiress to Swanson Dinners, graduate of La Jolla Country Day School, attended College du Leman in Switzerland, alumnus of St. George’s prep school in RI and Trinity College in CT.


If I wanted to watch tucker Carlson, I’d tune in to Fox News. I don’t do that because I don’t want to watch tucker Carlson. I don’t want to hear his voice. I don’t want to waste brain cycles on his shit.


This is a profoundly nice country, the nicest in the world. Americans are kind to children, to pets, to strangers.


“Two things about America make it great, the country and its people.”

Yeah, some of its people…
image image


“Americans know we’re not really in charge of the universe” is a right wing meme to explain not caring about climate change, pollution and pandemics. “We can’t do anything about what God has willed.” Yeah, fuck that shit.


he neglects to mention that all those beautiful national parks and nature areas he gushes about are also, under his orange overlord, being opened to mining and oil concerns because PROFIT.


Shitbirds like Carlson are extra terrible when they do stuff like this and cheapen the notion of loving this country. When they conflate the love of this country, patriotism, with the toxic stew of nationalism that they are actually peddling.

Because there isn’t anything wrong with loving this place! It truly is an incredible country that has done amazing things and is blessed with beauty and resources the like of which are hard to wrap one’s head around. It’s entirely possible to recognize all the ways that this country has fallen far short (so far) of its promise while also feeling the genuine love of this place without making it a zero sum game that requires thinking less of other places or pretending we’re something we’re not.


There seems to be an easy counter for this:

‘But, the maintaining the current climate and removal of pollution IS God’s will. After all, he put the climate, animals, rivers, mountains (etc, etc) in place without any pollution. YOU are going against God’s will by not tackling these things’.

This relies on me being as legitimate a mouthpiece for an omnipotent being as any one else, but that’s okay, I am!


Sorry, you really gotta give the guy credit when he’s right. We SHOULD thank God that, unlike the spotted lanternfly or the murder hornet, we have kept the blight of the metric system from our shores. It’s impossible to imagine where we’d be right now if we’d gone metric, because you’d need to imagine where you’d be in kilometers or meters or something and no true American can do that.




I really truly do not want to feel that. Nausea with just seeing it.


One more article about this idiot that i really didnt wanna see here.i try so hard to eliminate shitstains from my life, yet boingboing is making that impossible. oh well…
i am really trying to figure out any value in reporting on this fucker, but i come up short every time. why, thomdunn? oh, why are we paying attention to him?


I feel filthy that I was drawn to a Fox News link. Ugh.
I continue to believe that this asshole is being groomed for a run in maybe 2028. All the stuff I heard in this vid was a ‘kinder and gentler’ version of Donny’s MAGA riff.
Longing and dreaming of a place and time that never existed, which our hero will restore us to.
Optimism rather than sheer unbridled bullshit? Like everything else that spews from the turd, I rest completely assured that it is in fact unbridled bullshit.


I can’t speak to Americans being unusually nice, but the Chinese are frustrated with how indifferent they can be to each other. It’s common to post videos of some foreigner helping a stranger and asking why don’t Chinese act like this. I’ve always found strangers in China to be kind and patient with me, so it never occurred to me that it’s not common. But once you know about it, it’s easier to see.

Case in point: 3 of us white guys were walking a couple blocks to dinner. We came across a woman with a flat tire just staring at it and crying. We offered her help because that’s what you do, right?, getting her back on the road 10 minutes later. Hundreds of people had walked past her, but we were the first to help. Several people stopped to take pictures of us working.

It was the weirdest normal thing ever.



Watch Tucker Carlson’s bizarre Friday the 13th monologue about Patriotic Optimism

No, ta.