This doesn’t count. They’re just doing their job. When I interact with waitstaff, it’s pretty clear that it’s an employee-customer relationship, no matter how friendly they are with me or I am with them.
This might be because I’m kind of an outlier in that area, but my tip doesn’t depend on the bartender’s appearance at all. There are things that can affect how much I tip, but they have to be 1) service related and 2) really extraordinary. Most of the time, I just tip whatever I was going to tip.
Most bars I’ve been to have been busy enough where the bartenders don’t really have time to flirt with the patrons.
Playing devil’s advocate, if a bartender remembered me from last time, and treated me like a human being instead of an irritation, I would be more willing to give them a tip. Being nice to the customers I think would result in bigger tips, or at least it wouldn’t hurt. Even if a female bartender is being a little flirtatious, that doesn’t mean she’s tapping into some magical female power. It just means people tend to tip better if the bartender makes them feel good. I’m sure if a male bartender had good social skills, flirted with the female customers, and was easy on the eyes, he would get good tips too.
