I do appreciate your viewpoint, but I’m curious - what do you mean by this?
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Probably a throw back to what Mags said about ‘feminine wiles’ not equating to actual political power, and still not very relevant to the point… which is that men’s ‘Tex Avery’ overreactions to the physical appeal of certain women does not mean that we have them at an inherent societal “disadvantage.”
‘’
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I think everyone has experienced varying degrees of attraction to all sorts of people. Attraction has been described as electric as long as we’ve been describing it.
The point is that the feeling you described happened within you. It’s unlikely that anyone else had the same experience. Even if they did, it would be within themselves, and not universal or leveragable. I have a hard time calling your or my momentary attraction power over us, because that’s not how it works. Would you have really abandoned your children and jumped off a cliff for a stranger?[quote=“Max_Blancke, post:102, topic:101899”]
But overall, I am not trying to say anything negative about her or women in general.
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That’s cool, I didn’t think you were. I thought you were attributing too much to women in general.
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That picture makes my blood boil. This is off topic, but a bunch of powerful white men in a room makes me very, very nervous.
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Not really, because that pic right there?
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That’s “weapons grade” toxic masculinity…
And it will ‘kill the world,’ if we let it.
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I need one of your famed gifs here, but I’m under prepared for it. So, HELL YEAH. Does that count?
ETA: Please give me one, @Melizmatic, I know you have one in your arsenal.
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I have many, have a few varieties;
Fierce:
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Pretty:
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Chipper:
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Addictive:
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but nooooo it was the cute girl and her flirting that was the problem… umm no.
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Literally: Grow up. I can only assume you’re an adult. You are responsible for your own actions.
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Here’s another good emphatic one I forgot I had:
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I’m doing a standing slow clap in my home office, and my dog is confused. Even if you don’t understand or don’t agree, it is incumbent upon you to read and hear others’ opinions in order to inform your own.
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That’s exactly my takeaway from my years in therapy (Cognitive Behavioral Therapy) for depression and anxiety. As a kid I tended to lash out at people for my own feelings and emotional state.
Turns out, if you stop and realize that you’re the one controlling your own feelings and emotions, you empower yourself, and suddenly you’re no longer suffering at the whims of others.
Push your own buttons. I like that.
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Well, you are just on fire tonight, IMHO. Having many years of cognitive behavior therapy myself, all we control, ever, are our own reactions. Speak truth, brother/sister.
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It didn’t save me from many decisions that made me very unhappy, but I’m pretty sure it prevented at least one suicide attempt. And it was very helpful in helping me realize I’m my own autonomous person.
It’s almost like mental hygiene or something. When I get upset, I play the toddler-philosophy game: “why?” until I figure out the reactions I’m having that I’d rather not have. It’s important to take responsibility. Otherwise you’re letting everyone else live in your mind rent-free.
I like my mind. It’s all I really got. And the only thing I can control is myself. So it’s important to be aware of what’s going on in between your ears, and figure out how to in part: feel okay with it, and in part: modify your habits.
I know that like, 99% of my thoughts and actions are habits, and my wellbeing is almost completely reliant on making sure I’m executing good habits, and trying to excise bad ones.
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I may just love you.
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I like your mind too, very much.
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Our thought patterns are not written in stone. We can alter how we perceive the world; like most anything, it takes practice. That’s the beauty of cognitive behavior therapy (CBT). My immediate response to an anxious social situation may be to perceive that everyone is judging me, but through CGT, I can step outside my perceptions and re-evaluate the situation. The same is true for any belief, be it “weapons-grade femininity” or other knee-jerk reactions. It’s a beautiful mechanism – like hitting the pause button so you can more clearly see any interaction from multiple viewpoints.
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The only logical meaning of this phrase!
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One of the hardest lessons for me to learn, in regard to feminism, was the power and danger of the positive stereotype.
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All stereotypes do us all a disservice; they are the dull, inefficient tools of the mentally lazy.
It takes an investment of time and energy to get to know each person that you encounter as an individual.
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Overly simplistic ad-hominem approach, fellow person; let me take the liberty to not even.
But ya did, Blanche; ya did.
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