What coffee does to your body


#1

[Read the post]


#2


#3

Hang on…let me go get my double espresso so I can sit down and read this…


#4

It’d be nice for a standard definition of cup here, most people will assume their mug is a cup of coffee but it’s probably closer to 2 or 2.5 “cups”. I think my coffee maker defines a cup as 5 oz of coffee.


#5

Imperial Standard Metric Twenty-Foot Equivalent Unit cups, eh? I think I have the same model.


#6

Holy crap… now I want to write a short story about all the coffee in the world disappearing one day. Can you imagine the dystopia that would cause?


#7

TFA didn’t mention how the morning cup revs up the intestines.


#8

I think the standard measure for a cup of joe is 6oz or about 2/3 full for the mug I have at work. So a tall drip a McCoffebucks is 2 doses of caffeine.


#9

The funny thing is how “largely unregulated” can be so easily mistaken for “safe”. I mean, if washing down three or four Vivarin with Jolt Cola were bad for you there’d be warnings and stuff. Right, teenage me?


#10

I suspect that it would be a very good time to be a producer of one of the less scary amphetamine-family compounds. Everyone from the sinister corporate puppetmasters at ALEC and the US Chamber of Commerce to disaffected student anarcho-syndicalists would get behind a hasty reclassification of that one once the crash hit.


#11

There’re always Guarnara, tea, and other caffeine making plants.


#12

But what if it was caffeine that disappeared, entirely… ?


#13

“If Coffee did not exist, it would be necessary to invent it”


#14

Then I would have to kill the responsible parties and we don’t want that to happen do we?


#15

Well, let’s just say it’s one of those things, that has no explanation… We wake up one day, with no caffeine on earth… Can you imagine the riots? [ETA: I watched children of men this weekend, so am kind of in a dystopian mood here.]


#16

A world without caffeine isn’t a dystopia. A world where your employer provides free, mildly addictive drugs to make you work harder is a more proper definition of dystopia.


#17

I can imagine the quiet as we all hide in dark rooms till the withdrawal migraines go away. Oh I have been there and that is a big reason I limit myself to 2 cups of regular coffee a day.


#18

A regular zombie snoozpocalypse.


#19

So what do employers replace caffeine with? [ETA] Also, isn’t coffee then, something like sugar, in that it makes the current capitalist system possible and has become nearly a necessity for making it work? It’s both a commodity and a lubricant for the capitalist machine?

Plus, isn’t also intimately connected with the place of sugar in our modern consuming habits?


#20

Bingo!