Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/09/29/what-people-actually-say-before-they-die.html
…
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Oh, that’s why…
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I’m going to say,
Okay, now make sure the bucket is right next to my foot!
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My favourite line of her’s is “See you in a minute, kid.”
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I am mainly hoping to avoid a prolonged panic as I go.
oh fuck oh fuck is not reassuring 
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I just got out of the hospital on Monday after a balloon angioplasty and cath on Friday night for a massive LAD (Left Anterior Descending) heart attack. AKA the Widowmaker. It’s what killed Tim Russert almost killed Kevin Smith and now me… According to my wife, I was alternating between “Oh, fuck it hurts” and apologizing profusely to the EMT’s for waking them up in the middle of the night.
Obviously I didn’t die, but now I have a pretty good, if morbid, knowledge of what my last words might be.
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My father recently died. His last words were fitting. He was an engineer and a carpenter. His last words were, “I need my hammer.”
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I’d bet you could put it in the casket, or in the grave if you’re going the cremation route. When my mother died, we put small (relatively valueless other than sheer sentimental value) trinkets on the box (cremation) prior to the dirt going in. Yeah, I know you can’t take it with you, but I think it helped everyone a bit.
Also, when I die, I’m going to try my hardest to make my last words “Corn…nuts”… and crack my wife up one last time before I go (because by then nobody else will remember the reference).
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I don’t know about his last words but Spike Milligan had carved on his tombstone: " I told you I was sick".
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So glad you’re still with us. 
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“oops…”
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Most popular in 2020 is probably “Hold my beer…”
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I came extremely close to death a few years ago. As I stared up at the lights in the operating suite and the doctors sent the hospital chaplain out to my family, I told the nurse nearest to my head that on the TV show Dallas, Kristin shot JR. These would have been terrible last words, particularly because the nurse in question was much too young to have watched the show or to have known what I was talking about.
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Here’s one. “I can’t breathe.”
(－‸ლ)
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I wonder if (and if so how often) the last things people say are also the last things that they intend to vocalize; or if it’s relatively common for the brain to retain function longer than there is sufficient muscle control or airflow over the larynx to actually speak.
Probably take a bunch of dubiously ethical electroding to find out; but would be interesting to know if people often do get the last words they intend; or if they are getting cut off by peripheral failures while whatever statement the brain has constructed is still only partially delivered.
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“Don’t shoot, officer!”
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