I feel like I’m the only person who liked Dark Shadows. After the paint-by-numbers films he churned out for much of the 2010s, I felt it was a decent enough follow up to Sleepy Hollow. But then, I have eclectic (read - no rhyme or reason to it) taste in movies.
Both
and
were terrible movies, but seeing them together as a double feature at the drive in lent the whole evening a certain charm.
On the “two hours of my life I’ll never get back” list, we have the fore-mentioned Highlander II,
and
And closing out with the “WTF did I just watch” list:
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Damn. I remember watching and liking Little Miss Sunshine. But I don’t really remember any of the movie. Besides Steve Carrel being suicidal, and the older brother not talking.
Maybe I should waste a couple of hours to see what the fuss is about.
But I gotta agree, Goldmember is pure schlock.
Especially Fat Bastard. That’s some lightspeed unfunny shit there.
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A Town Called Panic is one of the GREATEST FILMS EVER!
Pure anarchic childlike fun. It rambles a bit as the makers are more used to shorts but hey underwater people steal our house, and we end up in the antarctic with a giant robot penguin! It doesn’t have to make sense as long as Cowboy and Indian are being idiots and Cheval is there to chastise them.
You can find the shorts on youtube under Panique au Village.
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I enjoyed AI, sort of. Though I thought cutting it off before we saw the future robot race would have made it a different, and probably better movie.
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Yes. Seriously overrated. When almost completely uncritical me-as-a-kid disliked a movie, you know there’s got to be something really wrong with it.
Equilibrium. I was told by a friend I’d like it. They were very wrong. It was silly and derivative and just completely meh.
Event Horizon. It was just too stupid to exist. I barely remember it – something about demons and a black hole. It wasn’t scary, it wasn’t good science fiction, and I didn’t care about the characters.
Battlefield Earth. We saved it until we had a housewarming party and everyone was drunk as hell, but I still couldn’t take it for more than a few minutes.
Beowulf (2007). The one that was 100% CGI because Zemeckis thought The Polar Express was a good idea, and where Angelina Jolie was Grendel’s Mother with biological high heels. And I still can’t believe Neil Gaiman worked on it.
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And Shoot 'Em Up has Paul Giamatti playing a bad guy. The movie is a turkey, but he’s wonderful in it. And Monica Belluci…
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No question: Santa and the Ice Cream Bunny.
Horrible, unwatchable, boring, terrible movie, made worthwhile by the fine folks at Rifftrax. But barely.
Also, looking upthread just makes me sad, so I should leave.
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Well, if we’re going to start a discussion about all the crap movies that were made bearable by MST3K, Rifftrax and Cinematic Titanic, then I can make my list WAAAAAAAAY longer. Because DAMN, have I seen some garbage movies.
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I’ve never seen MST3K, but I have seen
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Well, they pick some awful movies, and this thread is about the worst movie I’ve ever seen, so. If the caveat is “in the theater, when it came out”, well, that’s a bit different. In that case, I’d have to say either Chipmunks Movie 2 or Hop, both of which were insultingly terrible. What can I say, I have a young nephew.
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I read the book in the early 1980s, not knowing who the Scientologists were. I figured that it had to be good, since it was promoted as “Soon to be a major motion picture!” (The movie was made 18 years later.)
It’s the first novel I read where I realized “I can write better than this. I don’t claim to be any good at writing, but I can write better than this.” And my opinion went down from there.
The movie MUST be better than the book. It could hardly be worse.
Edit: It’s also Mitt Romney’s favorite novel.
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I really wanted to believe too. It was supposed to be X-Files with Billy Connolly, but it was horrible and IMO transphobic.
The only reason I didn’t walk out was because it was an unpleasantly hot and humid day and the cinema had air-con.
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I liked the Rifftrax version, in a “what the hell were these people thinking/smoking” sort of way… while also on all kinds of cold medicine myself.
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In the book, digging gold out of the ground is a labour-intensive task for the rebels, and they are strained to both complete that task and plot their rebellion.
In the movie, the aliens never bother to look in Fort Knox for the gold, so the rebels just steal the gold from Fort Knox instead of mining it. The aliens look at the gold, see that it’s been refined and cast into bars, and instead of thinking “They’ve found a stockpile of gold from way back then,” say, “You have too much time on your hands if you’re casting the gold into bars. I’m upping your quota.”
In the book, the humans have to use the aliens’ own weapons against them.
In the movie, despite it being centuries since Earth fell, the libraries, and all of their books, are still intact, and when the humans find an old military base, all of the equipment including the fighter jets still work, despite having received no maintenance since the invasion, so the humans take back the Earth using Earth technology.
Yes, the movie is worse.
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Which is darn near a remake of Cat Women Of the Moon from a year earlier.
Then there is the 1958 remake/sequel not sure which Missile To The Moon
I am both proud and ashamed I know this.
ETA almost forgot another version which I haven’t seen yet Queen Of Outer Space which I really need to do cause Zsa Zsa Gabor.
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I don’t remember anything other than the wooden ladder they used to get out of the ship, and the one lever that controlled everything.
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I’ll sit through damned near anything that might be the right kind of bad, but there was one movie that made me ask for my 2 hours back after watching it in a theatre - Kiss of Death. Full disclosure: I saw Natural Born Killers in the theatre and didn’t hate it nearly as much.
Blair Witch Project is also very high on my this-movie-is-the-worst-ever list. You parked next to the creek you crossed 4 times, upstream from your car, while you got ‘lost’ in the woods…I confess to having been chemically altered prior to the movie beginning, but holy hell, what a crapfest. I’m still mad I spent any cash on this.
So-bad-it’s-good movies are plentiful, I’m having a hard time singling any one out, but there’s a good chance Danny Trejo is in it, whatever it is.
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I liked it, too. I watched it as a kid and I saw this as Burton’s homage to the series.
Again, is it better than Random Hearts? Yes. So it’s worth watching. I measure everything with this metric.
