Why you don't park in front of a fire hydrant

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2018/06/15/why-you-dont-park-in-front-o.html


It’s also more righteous.


I’m sure the car owner’s insurance company will be delighted to tell them “No.” if they try to use their insurance to get those windows fixed.


I seen SD FD push the offending vehicle unceremoniously out’a the way with the Fire Truck, guess waiting for the tow truck isn’t an option when somethings on fire.


A) This way is faster. Getting that fire out quickly trumps some idiot’s windows.
B) If you look at the second photo, there’s a second car right in front of the idiot’s. No way to push it without either damaging the second car, pushing it into the intersection immediately behind the idiot’s car, or both.

Note that in most jurisdictions parking that close to an intersection is also illegal. Loser.


I’ve known a lot of hose jockeys.

Since they did this in that movie that one time they get all worked up at the idea of doing this kind of stuff.


I doubt it. After all, the point of insurance is to pay out WHEN YOU ARE AT FAULT.


When you play with the snake, you run the risk of getting bit.

Still, it’s a dick move. There’s no reason not to feed the hose over or under the car, except to punish the bad behavior of the driver – and that’s what the ticket is for. If there was room to hook up the hose, there was room to get around the car.

1 Like

I’ve seen worse - once saw the doors removed, too, in the late 80’s. Just because there’s room for the hose to be attached doesn’t mean there’s room for the water, under pressure. Do fire departments carry 90° elbows for such situations?


A fond memory from my youth… a car’s alarm was going off without stopping for a LONG time, and finally the police came. They looked at the car, looked for the owner, and then smashed the window of the car and turned the alarm off. They drove away with the applause of literally dozens of folks, peering out their apartment windows.


That ain’t a garden hose. The reason you don’t park in front of a hydrant is they need room to maneuver. You can tell by the pictures that hose isn’t going to make right angles very easily.

The dick here is the driver.


There are several. Time, for one. Keeping the hose straight, for another. You’ll note that the hose has a pretty tight bend just to make the window; over the top would be worse. Under? Even worse, less room to adjust (not to mention the matter of getting it under the car in the first place.) I’ve handled those hoses for mountain fires, they are heavy and don’t push for anything.

The one thing I might have done differently is open the doors once the windows were out. That would have given them a straight path through. Probably not worth the time, though.


They show something like that in the Bill Murray movie “Quick Change”: the angry firemen smash the windows, pop the gear, push it down an incline.

[ETA: a truly underrated and funny movie, especially for anyone who’s lived in NYC]


Thank you! I was trying to remember what movie I saw that scene in. I had it stuck in my mind that it was a Steve Martin movie.


I never understood why that movie disappeared so quickly. It’s one of the best things Bill Murray ever did.

“Flores para los muertos! Los muertos! LOS MUERTOS!”


I’ve seen a fire truck literally push a car out of the way. They don’t fuck around. If your house or business was on fire would you want the FD messing trying to carefully maneuver a hose around an illegally parked car versus getting right down to saving you and your stuff?


Also the joust. “It’s bad luck just seeing something like that.”


True, but it wont stop them from jacking up this person’s premiums & deductible… Also, depending on the policy, an insurer has a lot of room to deny your claim if the damage was avoidable (like if you were driving drunk, or lent your car to someone else). Insurance is your friend if you are acting within the law, but if you are constantly doing stupid shit, it’ll cost ya. Something tells my this driver wont be that worried about it.

Also, insurance is there to protect you when you’re not at fault too, like against hit-and-runs and against other under-insured drivers who might run into you. Or like if a tree falls on your car.


Of course it’s a BMW.