Zombie unicorn


Someone read @cstross 's new story?


That doesn’t look like a cone snail.


I need to request a non-zombie unicorn chaser.

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(c’mon BBS… what could be more descriptive than zombiecorn??)

Aah, the horror. It chases itself.

I have to admit that, living in the part of the country where the lawn flamingo was invented, I’m very tempted by some of the zombie lawn flamingo variants.


Mmm, unigore chaser.

Isn’t that the zombie version of that scary blue horse thing at the Denver airport that killed it’s sculptor?

I really hate unicorns. If they were real they would be the worlds most dangerous animals, and this would not be a “zombie” Unicorn, this is what they would really be like! Flesh eating killing machines!

Yes! Please do this. And post pictures. Absolutely brilliant! Makes me wish I had a front lawn.

I think the horn looks wrong. Even on the zombie version of an animal that doesn’t exist.

It’s a rhinoceros horn. Given that rhinos are one of the the creatures which may have inspired the unicorn myth, that horn is absolutely right.

As far as “most dangerous animals” – Dunno why, given that there are lots of other horned critters out there, some of whom have an equal reputation for nasty tempers. Consider the fact that Yellowstone Park, which has finally convinced city-slicker tourists that Bears Aren’t Cuddly, is now having to advise them that bison are also dangerous. (A ton of muscle, two horns, can wreck a bus if they’re feeling threatened. “They can run 35MPH. You can’t.” Herbivorous does not mean harmless.)

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It still looks wrong on a horse, the proportions don’t work out. Even on a zombie horse.
Should be more like a narwhal’s (or narwhale’s).
And as this is an excellent oppotunity for uncalled nitpicking allow me to point out that both African species and the Sumatran rhinoceros have two horns, while the Indian and Javan rhinoceros have a single horn.

To me it looks wrong on a rhino too, so it looks no more wrong on a horse. And any horn looks wrong on a horse.

There’s also some evidence that the European unicorn should be goat-based rather than horse-based. Which makes a lot more sense.

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