Alleged looter who occupied Pelosi's office says he deserves to be released from jail because he called her a "biatd," not a "bitch"

Unless he hangs with Pelosi on the weekends drinking chardonnay or enjoying mimosas with her and the other “girls” at brunch, I can’t imagine that “biatch” is a term of endearment between the two…

So weird. I’ve heard of the “chewbacca” defense, is this the “guuuuurl! I meant Biatch!” defense?

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My 6-yo comes up with better arguments than that when she gets caught doing something wrong. What a tool that guy is!

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So, basically, he’s arguing that he was a perfect gentleman.

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When I was a child I used to think that “alleged” meant “asshole”. People like this guy are the reason why.

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Maybe some dude from France hit him with the moniker — Le Bigot… then Dick took it from there.

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Hmmm. Lying under oath? When I once served on a jury, the judge instructed us that although witnesses were sworn in, we were permitted to decide for ourselves whether they told the truth or not.

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Lawyers are paid to concoct any sort of lie that can get their client off or charges reduced etc.

Good ones come up with genius level arguments, bad ones come up with things just short of a child’s “A pirate flew in the window and ate all the cookies and wrote on the wall, it wasn’t me!”

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“I was hacked.”
“It was a paper note.”
“…They were really good hackers!”

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So this dumba$$ believes he should be absolved of his crimes because he’s a crappy speller? I guess that’s as good a defense as any of these traitorous jacka$$es have had.

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I want to see this defense backfire with the judge tacking on extra time for being poor at spelling.

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I usually don’t blame lawyers for stuff like this, for basically that reason. The thing is, even just accepting this defense as gospel truth, it isn’t even a little exculpatory. If you are going to string together some bullshit it should at least help your client.

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I don’t think calling Pelosi names was why he was arrested, so I cannot fathom why the defense lawyer brings the subject up as a defense, unless he intends to get the eventual verdict overturned on the grounds that his client did not have proper legal defense at the trial.

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