For me, it’s kind of the context. Show up late to a meeting and I’m kind of annoyed. Particularly if you called a meeting. If I called the meeting, you received an agenda and I showed up at least five minutes early to make sure the room was ready. We ended early because I used our time efficiently and kept us from going off into the weeds.
I don’t work in a department where we have lots of cushion time in a day. If your meeting runs long, I may have to stay late. If you show up late to a meeting you called, I may have to stay late and may have to drive home in even worse traffic than usual.
Family event? I’ll plan on being at least fifteen minutes late and still show up first to the event. I live in a state where punctuality is mistaken for knowing better than to use “scare” quotes around “important” or “emphasized” words. #badjoke My family’s not from this state any more than I am but they took to the state’s lateness pretty readily.
Malort was one of the few beverages Carl Jeppson could taste
Carl Jeppson was a Swedish immigrant who came to Chicago in the 1930’s along with his home-made spirit. As a cigar shop owner and avid smoker, Jeppson loved drinking and selling Malort, because it was one of the only things his tobacco-ravaged tongue could actually identify.
Subjectively, I say with almost no reservations that that is a terrible reason for being late, as it is never actually important to anyone else, and if it’s actually important to you, you will habitually make time to consult a mirror when there still remains enough time to make adjustments. You would not make yourself 15 minutes late for a theatrical showtime just to enhance your appearance, since you know very well the show will go on without you. So you should treat face-to-face appointments and gatherings with similar respect. Nobody is pleased to put an event on hold for any length of time simply because you couldn’t be bothered to prepare your face sufficiently in advance.
And of course I say “subjectively” since I am obviously someone who barely cares about his own appearance. But I do caution even those whose fancy-pants metrosexuality goes far beyond hobbydom to crippling obsession that being derelict in your duty to your call time due to mirrors that catch your eye will earn you a lifetime of well-deserved Bad Press.
I have a friend, Adrian, who is perpetually late. So much so that its part of his personality. Whenever friends invite him we work on AST (Adrian Standard Time) meaning expected 30-60min late or ADT (Adrian Delayed Time) >90min late.
We’ve taken to telling him things start 2hrs before they do to ensure a timely arrival.
Point being, some people are early, some are late and for many, it’s part of who they are. If you want to call them friends you need to accommodate this personality “quirk” like they do with any of yours. It’s only a big deal if you make it one.
Two hours, wow! My high school friends used to do this to me, but only half an hour. I’m much better these days–I am not late to things that I want to do, as I really hate arriving at the last minute for a movie, play, etc.–but I’m still just a bit late to work, every day, because I can get away with it.
Thanks for that Donald and you know what, there may be some truth to what you say. In light of that, I’m going to try and track down the app, I just hope I’m not too late. Damn it, this one strand of hair is not cooperating.
I used to have a major anxiety about being late - an app like this would have sent me into meltdown if used on me. Over time I got over it by the world not ending when friends showed up late - that just gave me more time to read my book.
I do believe that with everyone being connected all the time via cellphone it is polite to tell someone if you think you will be more than 10 minutes late. I equate punctuality with respect, but I know not everybody does.
I do not see this app being particularly useful for anybody.
Hey, none of us are perfect, and god knows I’m late far more often than I’d like. My only excuse is that my two small children slow every preparatory process to a crawl. I’ve learned to back time the beginning of “let’s get ready to go” to at least an hour earlier than I would need on my own. Sometimes two.
And that’s the way to do it. We went down to my sister’s house for Thanksgiving last year, about 100 miles away. Dinner was at 2. We got there at 3. People were already eating. My wife was miffed, but she had no standing to be miffed. Food was gonna get cold, we were an hour late, traffic notwithstanding, and it doesn’t matter if 2:00 is a weirdly early hour for dinner.
We’re doing Thanksgiving at my place this year, and unduly tardy latecomers get leftovers, just like at my sister’s house. Not if they’re just a few minutes late, of course, but food will be served as promptly as it is scheduled to be prepared, or as close as possible, for those hungry souls who respect other people enough to at least try to observe a schedule. Timing a big dinner ain’t easy.
Habitual tardiness is not some personality trait. If people are telling you things are earlier than they really are then you know it’s you. Just be on time. It doesn’t take magic or some act of God.
Hey, if even Axl “Two Hours Late For Every Guns 'N Roses Gig Ever” Rose can be on time when he sings for AC/DC, then any of us can change our evil ways.
This whole discussion makes me think of Other-Culture Time (Colored People Time, Mexican Time, Arab Time, etc.) Americans are really into punctuality and time management in a way that borders on all the religious. And I mean the good and bad parts about religion: You’ve got practicality mixed in with irrationality, guilt, and anxiety. I mean shit, people make money writing books about it full of methods others will proselytize in the hope others will convert. Yet plenty of people figure out how to work without it.
I think of lateness as a venial sin – a moral weakness, to be sure, but forgivable. A demand that the world be put on hold because of one’s lateness is the sign of a depraved heart.
I live in a state where punctuality is mistaken for knowing better than to use “scare” quotes around “important” or “emphasized” words. 
