Badass Dragons of the Wasteland - Round Seven Missions

It was a lot of information to process. But it’s clear that Clank and Marion were together quite recently.

Retrieval and extraction urgently requested. Mechanic Clankenstein is most reluctant to tamper with my systems but he is not being given a choice.

If Mission3 hurries they’ll be able to rescue them both together.

[quote=“penguinchris, post:2, topic:26662”]
Apparently, this comes from the pleasure planet of Risa, where “displaying a horga’hn statuette indicated that one was seeking jamaharon, a mysterious and pleasurable sexual practice native to that world".[/quote]

Be very careful when you display those, folks. You’ll have better luck keeping the squids outside your cab at the end of flame thrower - you don’t want to send them the wrong message or else you might look at passenger seat and this would be the result…

If we rescue Clank I think we should get him a new pair of kicks and the 3rd Communicator. In the meantime, well, I’m gonna stick it in my other ear. I think I’m close to understanding the static of the universe…

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I met a chap once who said the very same thing.

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How the hell would I know…I can’t frigging read.

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Junior looks at the grid

BLINK

BLINK - BLINK

Lemmy: What is it, Junior? What do you see? Is it Chinese?

Junior: Uhm, ah, I’ll tell you later, Lemmy. It’s kinda NSFW, if you know what I mean.

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Lemmy: Ah, you sick freak. That’s why I like you, boyo…

Lemmy: But what if that’s a map to the Batcave? If so, where would you store the most valuable throne on the planet? If you are a right-thinking gent like me, you’d want to do your business in the quietest, most remote part of the complex.

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I reckon you might be on to something, Lemmy.

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~Clank: mood = black~

~The mechanic questions everything. What worth his paltry skills? His Whole knowledge of repair, granted by the Craftsman has been turned to be a tool for his enemies, because he cannot bear to think that Cougar’s kid might suffer.~

~While taking a break from the project that is at once technically interesting, but morally corrosive, he pops a pizza into the warming oven. He’s not actually hungry, it’s just a habit to keep something in the pipes for the Throne. It’s a really awful pizza, doesn’t generate much more for the ShitGo than eating the cardboard wrapper, but there are a few slices of something that passes for pepperoni on it. The mechanic fishes around in the glove compartment for some condiments to make it more palatable.~

~He finds an old spice jar at the back that he hardly remembers putting there. It’s labeled simply “'shrooms” and seems to contain a goodly number of sliced and fragmented and thoroughly desiccated mushrooms. He sprinkles a bunch on the pizza, counting on the steam from it warming to rehydrate the things.~

~While he waits, and to distract himself from the horrors of the consequences of doing the job he’s required to do, and of not doing that job, he turns the bottle around and reads the back. At some point he must have taken the time to hand-write an ingredients list, but it’s been so long ago the words seem foreign. It says:~

Various species: P. azurescens , A. muscaria , and others.

~The captive mechanic numbly eats the pizza, devouring the whole thing before returning to his task.~

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~Clank: mood = ??? ~

~Fleetwood is a horrible being, on many levels, but he did not lie when he said the task he expected of Clank was within his skillset. Manifolds are not just things that transport and divide intake gasses. They are also things that distribute and harness combustion products, making superchargers the instruments of power that they are. So creating a manifold of high-tension ignition wires to harness a plasma stream was really not so hard, once the conceptual barrier was overcome. As the task and the completion unfold in his hands, the mechanic feels oddly detached.~

(sound track for the rest of this post, open link in new tab)

[quote]Once I rose above the noise and confusion
Just to get a glimpse beyond this illusion
I was soaring ever higher, but I flew too high[/quote]

~The mechanic reviews his handiwork. It is a thing of beauty, actually, despite the use to which it will be put. It is nothing less than a force-field, roughly spherical, and nigh impervious to physical attacks. The van driver takes a weird pride in having engineered it so that narrow sliver of electromagnetic radiation that we call visible light can penetrate, but nothing else. Of course it all depends upon the ridiculous power output of which Marion is capable, so it must move with that entity. The force field would be large enough to contain one or two vehicles besides.~

[quote]Though my eyes could see I still was a blind man
Though my mind could think I still was a mad man
I hear the voices when I’m dreaming,
I can hear them say[/quote]

~Clank comes to see the Craftsman, not just as a disembodied voice, but a blinding white work-light, illuminating the most worn, grime-covered recesses of his mind, showing the truth that was engineered there, when Clank was a young driver, back before … ~
http://cdck-file-uploads-global.s3.dualstack.us-west-2.amazonaws.com/boingboing/original/2X/4/4f67d48fb899ec935471f049a4529dbeaf2ff797.jpg

~He was such a shiny thing in those days, and the whitewalls… an affectation then, but a charming, nostalgic attempt to seem more mature when seen through the lens of … what the hell was in those mushrooms?~

[quote]Carry on my wayward son,
There’ll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don’t you cry no more[/quote]

~No paltry limitation of equipment can stand in the way of speaking to his friends, and he has no fear of interception, though what they make of his words remains to be seen.~

I know this place.

I am in the way of knowin’ what might come to pass.

The turntable, there is more than one.

They can confound you, but also your foes. Respect them but do not fear them.

[quote]Masquerading as a man with a reason
My charade is the event of the season
And if I claim to be a wise man,
Well, it surely means that I don’t know[/quote]

The steam lift hides a secret of which Fleetwood has no knowledge.

It has been used and abused before.

[quote]On a stormy sea of moving emotion
Tossed about, I’m like a ship on the ocean
I set a course for winds of fortune,
But I hear the voices say[/quote]

They were simpler times, when every death trap had a weakness, and every foe could be defeated with just one cliffhanger.

Wayne kept them all, hidden away in the dank, unused passages, stored as trophies for his vanity, some are still useful.

[quote]Carry on my wayward son
There’ll be peace when you are done
Lay your weary head to rest
Don’t you cry no more no![/quote]

And perhaps most important of all…

This. Still. Works.

~The mechanic comes to know that the blinding white work light is NOT the Craftsman himself, but only a representation. The cord that provides the power comes from a place even higher…~

~Clankenstein rises, without moving, to a space ineffable. The broadcast, if that is what it was, fades.~

[quote]Carry on,
You will always remember
Carry on,
Nothing equals the splendor
Now your life’s no longer empty
Surely heaven waits for you[/quote]

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wow, like, where the hell have I been?

I completely blacked out, and things have only gotten weirder, and worser.

March Madness Indeed.

Do I still have time to sign up for a mission? If so, where I can do the most help?

–Bubba

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Rescuing Clank and Rescuing Marion are one in the same.

Rescuing the Kid will be done by Cougar, though Blazer already did a bit fumble-rooskie on that score. think Channing someone? is also helping on that front.

It wasn’t in the mission brief, but if you managed to find, and string up, Washington, that would be a hell of a bit of self-interested cooperation.

Especially since the early playbacks of the TCB seemed to implicate you with Toecutter, but then turned to Wash.

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Junior, I’m actually with you on Mission 3 to help bust out Clank. Mission 1 is all about speed, which I’m sorely lacking.

Besides, it’ll let me try out this Mark 2 Phaser.

Pew Pew!

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How do I do that? and how long do I have to sign up?

Thanks a million — a I am still pretty groggy from whatever the hell happened to me.

-bubba

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I think you @-penguinchris and @-donaldperson and you delineate your plan for Washington.

Sorry. A bit addled.

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Honey (@kyntha) is headed out on 1 as well, you can meet up with her or deal damage on 3, I think 2 is pretty much a wrap, story-wise. But nothing has been rolled as far as I know.

Of course, I do like the idea of you going after that Bond Bug as well…

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Bubba here, still catching up.

Since Mission 1 is all about speed, so that seems to where I should be. Unless I tell Jane otherwise, I’m on mission one. A Lotus Elan 26R versus a hopped-up Hollywood prop? hardly seems like a fair race :wink:

I am bit late to the spoils party. Any chance I can get that pair of Nike Roshe Run, Black Mesh ? Goes well with my oilskin jacket. But I’ll take whatever is left. I’d love some dilithium crystals, unless the good drivers who have been doing all the work this past week have rightfully claimed that stuff for themselves.

Fair Dinkum.

I’ll gladly take whatever leftover loot others can spare, and not bitch about it because, well, I’m still not quite sure what happened. But I am glad I dealt openly with Toecutter. I still wish he would sit down with our Jane and share some of his vast knowledge of people, places, and things. I still dream that our messiah mechanics can bring him to the Divine Torque of the Great Assembler.


Now, about Washington. who the hell is S/He? Not a driver, but apparently a traitor? One of Cougar’s original posse? If I risk my transmission to track down this person, how are we sure this person IS the traitor? and what use is Washington to us if I do bring in this wayward soul?

Traitors generally come in two types: the compromised and the self-destructive. If they’re seeking oblivion, don’t reward them by going sadistic on their twisted soul. If they have been compromised, they are as much a victim as a criminal. Then the key issue to to track down who induced them to treachery in the first place. For the compromised, disciplined kindness is a better starting point than unrestrained violence. I can calibrate that sort of thing.

So, to sum up: I am signed up for mission 1 for now, I would gladly accept any leftover loot, and I want to start a conversation about who Washington is, why we think s/he is a the traitor, and what I can do about it.

Thanks,

–bubba

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Washington is one of Cougar’s book keepers. I guess Cougar’s payroll just wasn’t enough.

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If I find him first, there’ll be a third type: Speedbump.

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Haha yes, that’s the stuff!

What’s the last thing that goes through a traitor’s mind when he’s hit by a 90mph transcontinental?

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