Badass Space Dragon - Round 6 - A Tiny Problem


#1

Results

Zero days since our last accident.

Today, we mourn the fall of the Pillar of Autumn, a good ship with a good captain, ripped to shreds by a volatile cargo of crystal hydromethane. It was a spectacular explosion, oranges and yellows fluttering like leaves in the dissipating oxygen.


***Captain Roger Wilco - Human (Outlaw)***


**No Action Today** | -1 GRIT

***Captain Beefheart - Space Lizard (ICUP)***


** ~ DEAD ~ ** | Killed by Don Mondo

***Captain Q'a'strastro - Human (Neutral)***


Unscathed and well paid, those pennies were put to good use!

**-$2850, +57 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**-$1500, +3 LK** | Lucky Penny
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Thrummel Carfax - Android (Outlaw)***


**No Action Today** | -1 GRIT

***Commander Jameson - Human (Outlaw)***


Moving explosive crystals never looked so easy.

**-$2650, +53 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$3900, +13 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$5000, +10 SH** | Armor
**-$4500, +9 EN** | 9 x Bits and Pieces
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Lenar Belox - Android (ICUP)***


Completely unscathed! Unbeleiveable!!!

**-$500** | Mission 3 Supplies
**$20,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!
**+1 GRIT** | No Damage!

***Captain Rhaegar - Human (ICUP)***


The I.C.U.P. has noted your excellent performance and dedication.

**-$39,500, +79 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$500** | Mission 3 Supplies
**-70 HP** | Space Scum
**$20,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Glenn McJlarty - aka McJ - Human (Outlaw)***


With your luck, was there even a doubt? Effortless.

**-$2250, +45 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$1800, +6 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$12,000, +30 LK** | 3 x Moonshine
**-$10,000, +20 SH** | 2 x Armor
**-$1000, +2 EN** | 2 x Bits and Pieces
**-$270** | Save Pete Fund
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Newb Naiv - Human (Outlaw)***


You navigate the asteroids with ease, must have been that lucky penny.

**-$4000, +80 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$9000, +30 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$5000, +10 SH** | Armor
**-$1500, +3 EN** | 3 x Bits and Pieces
**-$500, +1 LK** | Lucky Penny
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Lord Fritz - Android (ICUP)***


You took down the hoodlums with relative ease. A few dents but those will smooth over.

**-$29,000, + 58HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$4500, +3 FP** | 3 x Homing Missiles
**-$6000, +4 SH** | 4 x Flak Bursts
**-$500** | Mission 2 Supplies
**+1 EN** | Battlefield Analysis
**-30 HP** | Hoodlums
**$10,000, +1 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain PingPing Pandan - Human (Neutral)***


** ~ DEAD ~ ** | Dynamite Explosion

***Cap'n Ninedollar - Space Lizard (Neutral)***


**No Action Today** | -5 GRIT

***Skipper - Space Lizard (Outlaw)***


Smooth sailing!

**-$1900, +38 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$6000, +20 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$5000, +10 SH** | Armor
**-$2000, +4 EN** | 4 x Bits and Pieces
**-$1000, +2 LK** | 2 x Lucky Penny
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**+1 GRIT** | Looking Pretty Badass
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Krazy D Clown - Human (Outlaw)***


Clowns are expert navigators, not a hint of damage. It helps that the ship is smaller on the outside than the inside.

**-$3450, +69 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$600, +2 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$10000, +20 FP** | 2 x Mondo Cannon
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Marshal Paul Seldon - Human (ICUP - Marshal)***


The Ironclad brings down another Space Scum.

**-$26,000, +52 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$6,000, +4 ST** | 4 x Nightshade
**-$4,500, +3 SH** | 3 x Flak Bursts
**-$1500, +1 LK** | Clover Soup
**-$1500, +1 EN** | Glorious Gadgets, Gizmos and Gewgaws
**-$500** | Mission 3 Supplies
**-27 HP** | Space Scum
**$10,000, +1 GRIT** | Mission Success!
**$5,000** | Government Paycheck


***Captain Hogarth - Human (ICUP)***


A dangerous duel, the Iron Giant has prevailed!

**-$29,000, +58 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$10,000, +2 GRIT** | Hat
**-$250** | Flowers
**-$250** | Starbucks and Rum
**-$500** | Mission 3 Supplies
**-$1, +1 LK** | Permanently Mounted Lucky Dollar
**-51 HP** | Space Scum
**$20,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!

***Captain Adélie - Android (Outlaw)***


Usually cats don't drive so well. Steady paws and lots of luck.

**-$1800, +36 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$300, +1 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$15000, +30 SH** | 3 x Armor
**-$8000, +20 LK** | 2 x Moonshine
**-$500, +1 EN** | Bits and Pieces
**+1 GRIT** | Driving Cat!
**-$70** | T-shirt
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!

***Captain Increase Waistline - Human (Outlaw)***


**-5 GRIT** | No Action Today

Re-categorize some topics plz?
#2

***Captain David Falkayn - Human (Outlaw)***


Smooth Sailing

**-$2450, +49 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$6000, +20 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**-$10000, +20 SH** | Armor
**-$5500, +11 EN** | 11 x Bits and Pieces
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$100** | Pete's Fund
**-$2000** | Transfer to P.Patty
**-$1000** | Escrow for "Smuggle Pete"
**+1 GRIT** | Pep Talk
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Dr. Esstimpress - Human (Outlaw)***


**-5 GRIT** | No Action Today

***Captain Morel Lönnrot - Android (Outlaw)***


You admire the comfort of your fez as you drunkenly navigate the asteroid field. It's a miracle you survived, a good thing you can disengage your motor functions from your alcohol receptors.

**-$3500, +70 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$5000, +10 SH** | Armor
**-$5000, +2 GRIT** | Fez
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Saurodroid - Android (Neutral)***


Everything was going so well and then a glancing impact with an asteroid sent the Pillar of Autmn careening into another rock. It would have been a mild fender bender if your ship weren't packed to capacity with explosives. Unlucky.

**-13 HP** | Asteroids
**-68 HP** | Explosion
**-96 HP** | Big Explosion
** ~ DEAD ~** | Crystal Hydromethane Explosion

***Captain Richard M.Nixon - Space Lizard (Outlaw)***


Navigated the asteroid field while wearing a brand new Cthulhu Fez. Dapper.

**-$2000, +40 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$3000, +6 EN** | 6 x Bits and Pieces
**-$5000, +10 SH** | Armor
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**-$5000, +2 GRIT** | Fez
**-$900, +3 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$25** | Bar Bill
**+$2000** | Gift from Captain Falkayn
**$5000, +1 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***CaptainPedge - Space Lizard (ICUP)***


Another mine secured for the Coalition and another victory over space scum! This galaxy is going to be cleaned up and ready for holiday cottages in no time!

And don't you look dapper in that hat!

**-$35,000, +70 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$3000, +2 FP** | 2 x Homing Missssssiles
**-$4500, +3 SH** | 3 x Flak Bursts
**-$6000, +4 EN** | 4 x Glorious Gadgets, Gizmos and Gewgaws
**-$3000, +2 ST** | 2 x Nightshade
**-$3000, +2 LK** | Clover Soup
**-$10,000, +2 GRIT** | Natty Topper
**-$500** | Mission 3 - Supplies
**-52 HP** | Space Scum
**$20,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain El-Esk - Android (Outlaw)***


A nice relaxing fight with some low-level space pirates.

**-$3500, +70 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$1500, +5 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$10000, +20 SH** | 2 x Armor
**-$10000, +20 FP** | 2 x Mondo Cannon
**+1 EN** | Dueling Processors
**-$500** | Mission 2 Supplies
**-9 HP** | Space Pirates
**$20,000, +1 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Herpe'derp III of the Komodar Empire - Space Lizard (Neutral)***


**No Action Today** | -1 GRIT

***Captain Hot, Earl Grey - Space Lizard (Outlaw)***


**No Action Today** | -1 GRIT

***Captain Underpants - Human (ICUP)***


Well done! The main weapons manufacturing depot of Don Mondo's crime family has been wiped out!

The I.C.U.P. is interested in hiring you on as a Marshal. Interested? There's a $5000 signing bonus which you can put to use immediately.

**-$40,000, +80 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-9 HP** | Bolt Cannon
**-13 HP** | 1 x Drone
**$5000, +1 GRIT** | Mission Success!
**+3 FP, +2 SH** | Salvage.

***Captain Bonso Juneau - Android (Outlaw)***


Cake walk!

**-$3000, +60 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$1500, +5 MAX HP** | Hull Denisty Adjustment
**-$4000, +10 LK** | Moonshine
**-$5000, +10 FP** | Mondo Cannon
**-$10000, +20 SH** | 2 x Armor
**-$1500, +3 EN** | 3 x Bits and Pieces
**$50,000, +2 GRIT** | Mission Success!


***Captain Damianus Iulianus - Android (ICUP)***


One volley and these snippy hoodlumbots crumpled. They don't build em' like they used to!

**-$10,000, +2 GRIT** | Hat - but what kind???
**-$20,500, +41 HP** | Hull Repairs
**-$9000, +6 LK** | 6 x Clover Soup
**-$250** | 5 x Flowers
**-$250** | Cat Food
**-$500** | Mission 2 - Supplies
**-$500** | Mission Supplies
**-15 HP** | Space Scum
**$10,000, +1 GRIT** | Mission Success!

#3

I think I should only have $50075?


#4

CHARYBDIS

A Lonely Galaxy Publication

Welcome to scenic Charybdis, a paradise for the reclusive traveller. This remote galaxy was once a desolate space only inhabited by outlaws and prospectors but the recent annexation of the territory by the Intergalactic Coalition of United Planets promises a new frontier for tourism, resource development and recreation…

Charybdis, Power to the People
By Newt Greenwald

The new Coalition territory of Charybdis will provide a much needed boost to the flagging energy production of the United Planets. In addition to rich gas giants and hydromethane beds, more aggressive methods of planet coring and sun harvesting figure prominently into the coalition partnership with Galaxxon energy….

#5

Well.. hmmm.. your order is all screwed up. Fixing.


#6

Did I capture Pete or kill him? I was attempting to capture him, and if I did then I have $1k coming to me from the Exogenous Eccentricity Fund...


#7

He wasn't there... odd.


#8

...and captained by an avatar of an assstral being of BoingBoing, no lesss. What chance the ressst of ussss?


#9

I'm still alive! Yes!

Dr. Esstimpress


#10

Well, alrighty then. Hopefully he's OK somewhere. Maybe he's in disguise at the Star Bar, sipping whisky. I'll put my slippers on and go have a look...


#11

You have $51975. You were given a gift of $2000 and store credit was a one time thing.


#12

-- SYSTEM NOTE --

If you helped kill Don Mondo, Pete still wants nothing to do with you.

Ella will only deal with government friendlies. That means none of you folks who attacked the coalition.

Neutral ships can shop at either location but are not registered for government programs.

-- SYSTEM NOTE --

Scrapyard Pete's Secret Workshop

Of course I have a secret workshop inside a hollerd out asteroid! You thought I was gonna just sit back and get picked apart by coalition stooges?! Nope. My buddies PingPing and Freddie from the Hobar, bless 'em, found this place when they were haulin' for the miners.

I told you we had problems without Mondo to hold 'em back, now we've got Coalition ships crawlin' right up our cloacae

Listen, I realize it's complicated out there but if we don't want the guts ripped out of Charybdis, we've gotta swamp out these stooges and revenuers. Now let me fix up that junker so you can go cause some more trouble!

Note - Coalition stooges do not know about this secret asteroid and are not welcome.

Rot-Gut - Not much left. It smells like a sock and tastes like a toe... but it's got a helluva kick!
- $200/Jug
- $1500/Cask

Hull Repairs - I'll fix you up!
- $100/HP

Hull Density Adjustment - Increases MAX HP.
- $500/HP

Zot Guns (+5 FP) - I call them zot guns because they make this great electrical sound right before they fire... zzZot!
- $5,000

Scramblers (+5 ST) - These little guys send out all kinds of encrypted noise. Mostly porn. It takes forever to unscramble ...and it distracts the enemy!
- $5,000

~ Miner's Hard Hat ~ (+2 GRIT) - These beauties have a lamp built into them!
- $10,000 (limit one) -

Ella's Backwater Botique

Greetings. I am Ella, the owner and operator of Ella's Backwater Botique. Located on the beautiful ocean planet of Alador, we carry unique handcrafted weapons and high quality electronics. If you grow weary of roughneck traders and inflated prices, please consider shopping with Ella. Civilization in the rough.

Coalition Contractor: We Reserve the Right to Refuse Service to Thugs, Brutes, and Scoundrels.

~Affordable Repair Act~ (+50 HP) - A generous hull repair program for those ships who participate in Coalition approved missions.
- FREE -

~Hull Repairs~ (+1 HP) - The very best hull repairs, using 100% recycled materials and completely coalition compliant materials.
- $500/ea -

~Hull Density Adjustment~ (+1 MAX HP) - Strengthen your hull for life with our hull-istic improvement process.
- $2500/ea -

~Homing Missiles~ (+1 FP) - Track down terrorists with the press of a button.
- $1500/ea -

~Flak Bursts~ (+1 SH) - A beautiful shower of objects with varied heat and molecular signatures.
- $1500/ea -

~Glorious Gadgets, Gizmos and Gewgaws~ (+1 EN) - Parts of all sorts!
- $1500/ea -

~Nightshade~ (+1 ST) - Hull paint with embedded pattern replication filaments for cloaking. Defaults to a handsome charcoal black.
- $1500/ea -

~Clover Soup~ (+1 LK) - Delicious organic soup made from four leaf clovers and rabbit feet.
- $1500/ea -

~ Hat ~ (+2 GRIT) - We carry hats of all sorts, Pork Pies have been popular lately. We no longer carry the Bicorne De Marine. That evil lizard ruined them for all of us.
- $10,000 (limit one) -

~Flowers~ - These would look very nice on your ship. Do you have any plants?
- $50/boquet -

~Cat Food~ - The fancy kind. A delightful treat for cats or Space Lizards.
- $50/can -


#13

Today's Missions - A Tiny Problem

Mission 1 - A Tiny Problem

Parvos Perfide, known as "Tiny" among Don Mondo's crew, is a loyal lizard and hungry for revenge. He's actively hunting down Captain Pedge of the Quisquiliae sStruem, the ship that took out Mondo.

There's an 80% chance that Tiny will track down Captain Pedge this turn, a 100% chance if he gets help from other captains. If you want to stop Tiny, you can sign onto this mission and help defend Pedge.

Mission Cost: $500 (Food & Supplies)
Restrictions: This mission is open to any ship.
Reward: Whatever Pedge pays you, Salvage Rights, +2 GRIT
Risks: Tiny is pissed.

Mission 2 - A Tiny Favor

An eye for an eye. Join Tiny in seeking revenge against Captain Pedge. Avenge Don Mondo!!

If you help Tiny, there's a 100% chance of tracking down Pedge and you get to join in the battle on Tiny's side.

Mission Cost: $500 (Food & Supplies)
Restrictions: None
Reward: $50,000 split up between helpers, Salvage Rights, +2 GRIT
Risks: Captain Pedge of the Quisquiliae sStruem

Mission 3 - The Warship, Scylla

The coalition has launched the warship, Scylla, to escort a small fleet of private and scientific vessels into Charybdis. We know a bit about the Scylla, she has a fleet of at least fifty small fighters and top of the line weaponry, but we know nothing about these other ships. Reconnaissance is requested by the outlaws and from the looks of things, the resistance will need to grudgingly contract with a "Coalition Stooge."

Mission Cost: $1000 (Food & Supplies)
Restrictions: None (although very difficult for non-ICUP ships)
Reward: $5,000, +1 GRIT, Access to Pete's Shop
Risks: Scout Drones, Fleet Scramble, Matter Disruptor Ray

Coalition Stooges
40% - ONE Nosy Drone, lose HP (1-10 HP based on FP & SH)

Neutral or Outlaws
50% - Matter Disruptor Ray, lose HP (100-150 HP based on FP & SH)
20% - Swarm of TWO HUNDRED Drones, lose HP (1-10 HP based on FP & SH)
80% - Fleet of FIFTY small fighters, lose HP (30-60 HP based on FP & SH)
Calculated on a per item basis. For example, each missile has a 10% chance of hitting for 10-20HP

Mission 4 - Space Cadet

The handsome star of stage and holo-screen, Brad Nebula, has come to Charybdis to work with the orphans and under-privileged sandfish gutters. Your job is to keep this fool alive as he traipses about the galaxy.

Mission Cost: $500 (Food &Supplies)
Reward: $60,000, +3 GRIT
Risks: Space Scum

Note - This fight is not a pig pile mission, you will be flying solo.



Sit out this round -5 GRIT

Round 6 ends Thursday, October 3rd at 11pm (PST)

Questions? Comments? Post them in the Rules & Gameplay Thread.

#14

Those peerlessly honest circuits at Endogenic Escrow haven't refunded my $1,000, so they don't think he's dead or in Coalition custody....

update -the posts went up simultaneously. Pete is fine. I am informing Endogenic Escrow to release the $1,000 to whome ever Pete thinks deserves it -- including himself.


#15

The engines of the Burnt Asbestos are humming and the floors were freshly-waxed by 6:00 AM. I know I'm not going to over-sleep this time.

Having wandered around Charybdis while trying to keep my head out of trouble during many of the last missions, I feel like I know the place pretty well. If anyone's got to be a tour-guide to a pretty-boy, it looks like it should be me. I'll take Mission 4.

Gotta upgrade to fight Space Scum, though. Shopping at Pete's:

Starting cash: $50,074
5 x Zot Guns: -$25,000
1 x Scramblers: -$5000
19 x Hull Density Adjustment: -$9,500
15 x Hull Repairs: -$1500 -- (I assume I need both to upgrade to 115 HP, right?)
1 x Miner's Hard Hat: -$10,000 -- it'll help me see the Space Scum first, I swear!
Mission 4: -$500

Cash remaining: $74. New FP: 39, new ST: 19, new HP: 119, new GRIT: 7

Edit: new values in bold.


#16

Misssion 3 ssssoundsss like sssuicssside to me, and the resssissstancssse isss not helped by the eliminassshion of Captain Pedge.

Thisss lizard leans towards Misssssion 4, but we need to hear the proposssal of the captain of the Quisssquiliae sssSSStruem - however I feel that taking protecsssion money from him isss robbing Peter to pay Paul. Perhapsss he would be bessst rewarded by trusssting to luck and invesssting in lotssss of nightssshade?


Badass Space Dragon 2.0 - Registration
#17

Well done to everyone who followed the first rule of space mercantilism: stay alive for your next trade.

Today is another great day. Again, we each decide for ourselves. As I said last round:

"Enjoy Today. Make Money. Stay Alive."

However, if anyone is considering Mission 2 - A Tiny Favor, please discuss your reasons with us. Even an unflinching killer like Chee Lan doesn't see the percentage in a cheap hit like that.

My thinking goes beyond that. To decide our future, we need beings who can decide for themselves. Eliminating any such being constrains our future. Destroying the Quisquiliae sStruem murders future possibilty.

Since arbitraging future possibilities is how I make my percentage, I am putting my starbucks where my communicator is. I have deposited $24,000 starbucks with Endogenic Escrow, with instructions to *pay $4,000 *immediately *, (i.e. before the mission) to the first six captains that sign on for ** Mission 1- A Tiny Problem ** . The *Quisquiliae sStruem is currently the richest ship around, so hopefully Captain Pedge will sweeten the pot.

Recalling how the I.C.U.P. treated it's "side" in the last round of missions, I love the idea of captains who the I.C.U.P thinks they own choosing Mission 3 - The Warship, Scylla. We need good intelligence. Even more, we need Pete to get past his grieving for his beloved scrapyard and focus his feelings on the I.C.U.P. The more "ICUP" ships that show up at his new digs, the better. If you are considering this mission but are short on cash. please contact me: I may help pay for your costs .


#18

Out of Character: Minor clerical errors, my LK should be 20 because of the clover soup, and I should have earned 20k and 2 grit, because I took Mission 3 wink


-$500 | Mission 1 Supplies.
$0, +50 Hp | Affordable Repair Act
-$7500, +5 FP | x5 Homing Missiles
-$6000, +4 EN | x4 Glorious Gadgets, Gizmos and Gewgaws
-$10500, +7 LK | x7 Clover Soup

Additionally if the 4K escrow clears.
-$4500, +3 LK | x3 Clover Soup

(after all this, I'm left with 6 starbucks)


#19

"I'll take the 4K Sir, we want to pack some extra punch for this mission.

I also want to let you know that According to our CTO calculations, we'll only need 2 more ships to join the battle, 3 to make it safe, unless we face unexpected opposition."


#20

I think I'm supposed to have 69HP, correct?

Huh, huh, 69.