ButcherBox will deliver a box of grass-fed meat to your doorstep

Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2016/11/12/butcherbox-will-deliver-a-box.html

But that name! ButcherBox sounds like something from Saw XXIII.

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Literally the first thing I thought of

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Picked from Steak Trees by hand by experts.

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…uh, if you know anything about meat you know this is just weird. Asking for the freshest steak is like asking for the freshest wine.

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And yet I still can’t get funding for my meat-fed grass startup. What a world.

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Oh look, another person using “toxins” to mean “bad things I imagine are there but cannot actually pinpoint”.

Bad BoingBoing!!

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But, but, toxins!!! :open_mouth:

Meanwhile, it does not even follow that “grass fed” == zero “toxins”. Uhm, nor that any brand of beef provides me with “all the nutrients” I need.

It’s really nice that the copywriter doesn’t just make stuff up about how much he or she really likes the product but actually uses it. I’m really glad that Boing Boing provides us with these kind of completely honest 1st person reviews. I cannot even say how much I appreciate this.

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I see what look like pork chops. Grass fed pigs is it? Really? That’d be pretty gosh darn cruel to the starving pigs. They aren’t ruminants, they can’t live on grass.

I was even thinking of giving this a try until the ad copy disguised as an article sank in.
“fresh” steaks isn’t so great either.

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And the bacon. Mmm…grass fed bacon…

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Bat poop is what you want for your grass start-up. Allegedly…

Hmm… meat-fed-bat-fed-grass… could be big.

And what if I fed that to the cows…

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100 percent grass fed isn’t that great. We used to have a family ‘hobby’ farm and the cows did do grass feeding in the summer, and hay in the winter…but they were supplemented with a couple of types of bagged horse feed. The ‘pellet’ type and molasses soaked oats and grain mix.
I’d put that stuff up to “Kobe” beef any day…lots of thin spiderweb fat in the steaks.

Even in the summer they got the horse food twice a week. Winter it was every day.

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amen to that. lols are had at what people would think if you cut them a steak from a still twitching critter, and cooked it.

also . . . why not just buy New Zealand, Australian or Brazilian steak?. We don’t torture our animals in buildings half the year, almost no one does anything other than pasture rearing. Plus, very very little growth hormone is allowed or used in any stock industry, only the chicken growers use antibiotics, and the general level of pollution is far lower. Worked on farms and in the hospitality industry here in NZ, the tourists spend their first few days saying “your meat is delicious, but OMG why is it so expensive?”. But you pay for quality, and actually it isn’t quantitatively more expensive then US meat anyway, just half again as much, if I remember correctly.

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They can’t be as fantastic as Trump Steaks™!

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Reminds me of the Chicken Shack chain in Texas, from my childhood. They served chicken that was fed catfish byproducts, and catfish that was fed chicken byproducts. Mmmmmmm. The sweet taste (and economy) of a closed loop!

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No no, by an ancient tribe of aboriginal herdsman in the Outback, blessed by a rabbi, chanted over by a Gregorian monk, artisanally cursed at by a New York stevedore and delivered on dry ice by steamboat to your doorstep vaccine-free and ice-cold in July…sustainably!!!

Don’t trust chemicals, they’re just out to kill you.

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