Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2024/03/01/canadian-terror-turkey-taken-out-with-slingshot.html
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Does this work?
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That’ll do, but there’s a big opportunity here for an A24 style one with bleak, muted photography, that certain brooding irony.
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Turkey’s aren’t flightless. They roost about 10 feet (3 meters) above the ground. Many New York and New England motorists have collided with turkeys flying across roadways at windshield level. Terrifying, actually.
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If the hero doesn’t say, “Get stuffed!” before shooting the turkey, I’m not interested.
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Begun, the Gobble Wars have.
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Right, wild ones aren’t. It’s the industrially produced mutants that eventually can barely walk, let alone fly.
That fat-breasted freak is the one that most members of western societies envision when hearing the word “turkey.”
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In the US the Dept of Wildlife is the entity that would be tasked with dispatching something like an aggressive turkey. (They may or may not do it.)
At any rate, if one were to do something like this, the last thing you would do is have it make the news. And the second last thing would be to keep and display the spurs, as that could be illegal too with out a tag for it. 
(Hunting regulations vary state to state, and country to country. YMMV. Check your laws.)
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Or her…
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Thanksgivilante: First Bird
This is going to be a great franchise.
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Especially in Quebec, famously a Civil Law jurisdiction. This incident ain’t never gonna see the inside of a police station, never mind a court room.
(And it’s km, and litres, so your mileage is inverted too, eh? 
)
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Looks like he has moved on to New York:
This will probably be dramatized in the third movie, when the Thanksgivilante is found by his former commanding officer/manager from Boston Market, who flies him to Staten Island to single-handedly fight the flocks and re-establish the pecking order. It will be widely seen as the weakest film in the franchise.
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The turkey realized that “turkey” can be used as an insult then went nuts.
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Sooo much to unbrine in that episode.
As stories of local government celebrating and encouraging covert vigilante action go this one seems reasonably harmless.
If Jason Statham isn’t attached to this project already I’ll eat my pilgrim hat and buckle shoes.
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Can Statham do Norfolk?
