Crimm Grunk Garlic Cleas - and other recipes created by a neural network

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Originally published at: http://boingboing.net/2017/03/30/crimm-grunk-garlic-cleas-and.html

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are you sure this isn’t one of @OtherMichael’s twitter bots?

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Chocolate Chicken Chicken Cake

I’m thing a Savory Chicken Molé type thing…

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Cognitive Cooking with Chef Watson: Recipes for Innovation from IBM & the Institute of Culinary Education https://www.amazon.com/dp/149262571X/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_apa_Iet3yb23ZW3C2

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I,for one, welcome our robot chef overlords!

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I literally laughed out loud when I read this on Tumblr yesterday. Especially “Crockpot Cold Water” for its simplicity, and Whole Chicken Cookies (“if it didn’t have any bones in it, it wouldn’t be crunchy then!”)

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Mmmmm, Beasy Mist the way mom used to make!

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Sadly, I’ve done no neural network work yet.

There have been some other attempts at generating recipes with less “smart” algorithms as part of NaNoGenMo which have been interesting.

And I was thinking of a mayonnaise-recipe bot, but never got around to it.

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First, using the flat of your vorpal blade, smash the TumTums into a tulgey paste. Put them over a galumphing flame for 5 minutes. If you hear them snicker-snack, you have the flame too high, remove and wait for the manxome bubbles to subside.

While you are waiting for your TumTums to whiffle, carefully quarter you bundersnatch and prepare it for roasting.

Mince your toves (pick out any slithy ones) and borogoves (if in season, opt for the mimsiest ones you can find). Mix together and apply as a dry rub to the skin of the Bundernatch

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I’mma get started on that recipe now!

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I’m disappointed the recipes are not actually viable, the instructions make less sense than the titles:

"Brown salmon in oil. Add creamed meat and another deep mixture.

Discard filets. Discard head and turn into a nonstick spice. Pour 4 eggs onto clean a thin fat to sink halves.

Brush each with roast and refrigerate. Lay tart in deep baking dish in chipec sweet body; cut oof with crosswise and onions."

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Not that clever, but then neither are humans

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I’m NOT disappointed for exactly the same reason. “Discard head and turn into a nonstick spice” should be a non-sequitur in every recipe from now on.

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Judging by this one’s output you’re already ahead of the game!

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So, basically, it’s just making stuff up.

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Just like the recipes on the Food Network.

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These all read like normal recipe names poorly translated from Japanese

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I have no mouth and I must cook.

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Gibberish is an accomplishment?

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Completely Meat Chocolate Pie sounds totally possible. I would make a bacon crust by cooking a bacon lattice in a pie pan. I would then fill the crust with the cooked shredded or ground beef of my choice. I would then add chocolate syrup to displace the air, dust with instant cocoa and ground red chile to taste.

As an alternative to syrup, a fudge sauce can be prepared with chocolate chips and condensed milk, which might be better, but makes the recipe that much weirder.

It might have to be cut with a pizza roller cutter.

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