David Lynch cooks quinoa

Originally published at: David Lynch cooks quinoa | Boing Boing

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Back in the summer of '97 I was in North Macedonia ( FYROM at the time) on a UN mission. A few friends and myself took that same train from Skopje to Thessaloniki, a coal/wood fired steam engine. If you opened the window gales of soot and smoke came wafting in.

Departed Skopje around noon or so. I remember passing a forest fire at one point but couldn’t say where. We stopped at the greek border for about two hours. Pretty sure we couldn’t proceed until sufficient bribes had been paid because the police came down the train and made everyone hand over cash. The locals were also walking the corridor hawking meat on a stick, cheap cigarettes (Bond! Bond!) and local Brandy. I think the train got into Thessaloniki in the late evening, then we switched trains to overnight travel to Athens, which got us in at about 6am.

On the way back two weeks later we brought a bottle of Ouzo to drink on the train. It was pretty strong but we presumed we could just dilute it with lemonade or whatever. But the taste was still so overpowering we ditched the bottle and counted our losses. On an extended stop in the city of Titov veles (Veles) I picked up some porcelain which my daughter uses as a tea set now.

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Ah, Quinoa. The thing that everyone in the US should be avoiding like the plague.

Cook farro, or wild rice, or barley, or plain old bulgur instead. Leave Quinoa for people who have seen a vicuna in the flesh, and celebrate the things that don’t promise miracle cures and don’t lead to worsened food security for people in the Andes that you are pretending to emulate.

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Ugh! I don’t drink anything like that at all but water would surely be the only thing you would dilute it with? Some sticky sugar thing can only make it grotesque.

Mind you I have drunk rum and peppermint cordial. It was a thing we did in reference to childhood dingy pubs.

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I love this too. And it’s likewise one of my pick-me-ups when feeling down. And I am. So thank you Popkin.

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Pretty sure we used to mix Rum with Ribena, and called it a “Rum and Black”

I also have a bad memory of trying to mix Paddy with Lucozade.

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That was the alternate drink on those evenings. Rum and pep, a beer after and rum and black after.

I was thinking of my great uncle’s pub in northern Ireland. English army/navy had such a huge influence on food and drink culture.

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AFAIK, the traditional way is to dilute the Ouzo with water … it goes all cloudy, which is understood as sign of quality.

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A double mistake!

Like a friend told me of mixing absinthe and red bull. Possibly the worst drink mixing idea ever.

Well maybe after Keith Moon and Robert Wyatt and their tequila/Southern comfort alternates.

I’m not going to see if I can find Robert describing it on video, but here’s a quote Everything about The Who — Robert Wyatt (Soft Machine) on drinking with Keith...

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If I ever had to explain David Lynch to someone that never heard of him I think this video would be my go-to. The cinematography is so extreme that as the cooking video it purports to be it is a failure, “Use this much sea salt” as the sea salt he is about to add is just below the frame, out of view. “Use this much quinoa” as the stark contrast on the black and white video makes both the cup and quinoa appear pure white.
The instructional aspect is fully subsumed by the style of the film making, to the point that watching the story told by the film making is more important than any dialog or commentary in the film itself.

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I feel very peaceful after watching David Lynch cook quinoa.

I feel very peaceful after watching David Lynch cook quinoa. too.

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Makes me wonder if there’s any conversations between Werner Herzog and David Lynch out there

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Quinoa had a natural poison on it you MUST rinse off before cooking. It’ll taste weird and may upset your stomach. Someone PLEASE TELL David Lynch to rinse It first!

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I’m feeling very peaceful right now!

I mean, right nooooowwww…

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Just to elaborate

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Leave it to David Lynch to cook up a cascading series of nightmares from which there is no escape.

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Interestingly, the main Guardian article cited by that article was later contradicted by yet another Guardian article which essentially says that eating quinoa does not in fact perpetuate a developing world nightmare.

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Counterpoint: Quinoa isn't a threat to food security. It's improving Peruvian farmers' lives | Guardian sustainable business | The Guardian

And your claim that eating quinoa = pretending to emulate Andeans is pure woke BS.

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For us it was rum and clove cordial/syrup (topped up with boiling water).

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