Dead squid can have sex with your mouth, and it hurts

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The FUCK they can!

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Dead squid care nothing for consent…

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Rule 34 applies!

Do Not Google! You have been warned!

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Squid: “Bring it, xenomorphs.”

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Someone tell Frank and his editor that the plural of apparatus is apparatus.

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seriously tenacious ejaculatory apparati

dot tumblr dot com.

[That’s the new WBAGNFARB.]

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Apparati is certainly wrong, but apparatus can be treated as a self-plural noun (like glasses) or it can have a super-plural apparatuses. Apparatus is a collection of bits to perform a function, as in “laboratory apparatus”, but if I have two machines to make hydrogen sulphide instead of one, I am allowed to say that I have two Kipps’ apparatuses or apparatus. Both the OED and Merriam-Webster agree with this.
Personally I would avoid using “apparatuses” but that’s because I try to avoid sesquipedalian words.

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C’thulhu Phuq That!

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I used to like calamari, until just now.

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You are correct, sir. My knee jerks quickly at the sight of “apparati” ever since a long argument I had with a patent attorney.

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Mmm delicious squid jizz.

Also I presume the squid in question was fresh when cooked and wasn’t cooked too long. I think this is a very very rare occurrence

It’s ok, calamari is all just pig bung, anyway.

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you forgot the comma after FUCK.

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Aaaaauuuuuuggghhhhhhhhh. Guess I’m one step closer to going vegan!

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You have to really let them know who’s boss…

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This has got to be the headline or story Of. The. Year! Maybe even of the decade.