Every COVID-19 commercial is exactly the same

Originally published at: https://boingboing.net/2020/04/17/every-covid-19-commercial-is-e.html

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Even more annoying than the same 22 year old concerned young womans voice that does every commercial voiceover for the last 15 years

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Old commercial: Buy a Toyota

New commercial: These times are tough - buy a Toyota and we’ll let you skip payments for 3 months.

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That pianist must be raking it in.

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Ugh, the “we’re here for you” and “everybody claps” parts made me a bit nauseous. We’re here for us, so clap, worms, and love us when we say we’re going to make it a little easier for you to give us money.

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I’m glad we don’t make commercials for our (remaining) clients, or I’m sure we would be doing the same thing.

Also, thanks for this. We never watch live TV anymore, so I had no idea this was going on.

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This gave me the most genuine belly laugh I’ve had since this shit kicked off. Thanks!

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Hopefully this commercial will put these terrible self-serving ads to bed.

Today’s Buick YT ad: “[blah blah uncertainty blah trying times] so if you need a vehicle…we’re here for you.”

As if someone out there has a COVID-19 problem only a Buick can solve, if only Buick were there for them.

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As an employee of one of the companies featured in the video, I’d like to reassure you all that I am indeed here for you.

And by “here”, I mean hiding in my house away from all you damn plague rats, furiously tapping my fingertips on a tray of black plastic rectangles, because that makes a difference.

And by “for you”, I mean I’m certainly doing it so you can buy our stuff, but I also might be doing it for the paycheck; that hasn’t really changed much.

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All advertising is just pollution of the information environment, and this smug, self satisfied type is one of the most off-putting types of it.

These ads are the mental equivalent of patting yourself on the back as the sewage outflow that you’ve commissioned discharges foamily across a public park.

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This is par for the course. The people making these have all been working from the same playbook all along. Corporate advertising was unoriginal before covid, so it’s no surprise nothing has changed within or between these ads.

Great compilation, though. I plan to share this with some colleagues who teach advertising, PR, and marketing.

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Wow, these companies really care about me, I’m totally going to buy their products!

As soon as I have extra money and shit, and like, you know. . . a job.

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Video link for the BBS
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vM3J9jDoaTA

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the Facebook ad “Never Lost” is just an edit of Kate Tempest’s “People’s Faces” from the album “The Book of Traps and Lessons” which dropped in June of 2019.

A wonderful poem by a gem of a person.
Poet, Playwright, Novelist, Rapper.

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There is some degree of truth to this ad. These companies have been chipping away at extended families for most of the 20th century and all of this one, and its made a difference. We are now so isolated from ourselves, our families, our heritage… that the only way to survive is to buy it back in small, shriveled pieces from these assholes.

And honestly, 18 months is nowhere near enoigh time to undo a hundred years worth of this shit.

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This song feels far more appropriate, and it’s already been used for a Honda Civic commercial!

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…and it won’t be a pretty sight.

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When I talk of seeing real ugliness in the crisis, this is what I mean, not some guy sneaking out of hotel quarantine to see his girlfriend.

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Eerily reminiscent of post-9/11 ads. There was literally one saying that if you don’t buy their refrigerator, the terrorists will have already won.

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