Facebook plans to fix everything by rebranding under a new name

Originally published at: Facebook plans to fix everything by rebranding under a new name | Boing Boing

6 Likes

I dunno…

Evil 'R Us?

35 Likes

Do you think they’ll be smart enough (and fast enough) to buy up all the domain names before announcing?

Also, this is right out of the tobacco company playlist.

34 Likes

Isn’t RJ Reynolds available now?

28 Likes

Renaming itself “Fascistbook”?

31 Likes

Sure, that’s going to work. Because calling dog shit “canine manure” makes it smell better.

21 Likes

I nominate Zucker. Motto: “Born Every Minute”

26 Likes

How about FACEBOOK?

4 Likes

BlackwaterBook
XeBook
AcademiBook.

18 Likes

OrwellianBook
Dystopedia
ExtremistFactory
ThePrivacyThievesFormerlyKnownAsFacebook
RacistHaven

10 Likes

Xfinity?

15 Likes

Check it out, someone posted M.Z.'s meeting notes from the brainstorming session online.
image
The Lesser Key of Solomon

Honestly, these would be pretty cool company names.

The 68th spirit is called Belial ,78 he is a mighty king and powerfull; he was Created next after Lucifer, & is of his order; he appeareth in ye forme of a Beautiful angel sitting in a Charriot of fire, speaking wth a comly voice, declaring that he fell first & amongst ye worthier & wiser sort wch went before Michael & other heavenly angels; his office is to distribute preferments of senatorships, and to cause favour of friends & foes, he giveth Excellent familiars & governeth 80 Legions of spirits. Note this kink [! *king] Belial must have offerings sacrafices & gifts presented to him, by ye Exorcist or else he will not give True answares to his demands; But then he Tarryeth not one hour in ye truth except he be constrained by devine power & his seal is Thus wch is to be worne as a Lamin, before ye Exorcist &c.

8 Likes

Skynet, duh.

20 Likes

Oh, the old demonology!

My favorite is Furcas

Furcas is a knight and commeth foorth in the similitude of a cruell man, with a long beard and a hoarie head, he sitteth on a pale horse, carrieng in his hand a sharpe weapon, he perfectlie teacheth practike philosophie, rhetorike, logike, astronomie, chiromancie, pyromancie, and their parts: there obeie him twentie legions.    

Johann Weyer (1583)[3]

He perfectly teaches logic and philosophy, so you know he’s a really really evil demon in the church’s eyes.

12 Likes

Didn’t Comcast try something like this? We all know that Xfinity is still the old Comcast but with more obfuscation. Personally, I don’t “do” social media, and life is good.

12 Likes

This is social media

20 Likes

Refuge O’ Scoundrels
Co-opt Every Election-ator
U R The Product
Perfect Turnkey Surveillance
RageFarm (dot U S)

?

12 Likes

“A new name”

Groan. That’s a pretty cheesy way to avoid the negative consequences of your business practices. Can’t imagine it’ll be too successful, either. Especially since the practices will be ported over to the new ventures.

"will choose a new name highlighting its plans to build a “metaverse”

Double groan. The whole “metaverse” thing has become such a nonsense buzzword beloved by scammers. What they’re doing is VR equivalents of Facebook pages, presumably. That ain’t a “metaverse.”

22 Likes

Bukkake.

10 Likes

spit-take!

3 Likes