Feds approve 2-6 hours of daily porn viewing for government workers


#1

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#2

Caption writer wins the internet.


#3

Before people grumble about government dysfunction, I heard the same story recently from a friend at a large publicly traded tech company.

Apparently, it all comes down to the unbelievable wrongful termination suits that have been found in favor of the plaintiffs.


#4

Is looking at porn and threatening someone the same?

Maybe this person does their job well in 2-4 hours a day and has to sit there the rest of the day. That said, this always baffles me. How often do you masterbate if you watch porn for 6 hours at work? What is the point? Get a better hobby bro.

I also like the point above. There are reasons shitty people don’t get fired in most every workplace. Worker protections do more good than bad.

The real problem in govt is that any special treatment for govt employees is treated like terrible corruption so most folks are inspired to little more than the minimum not to get fired.


#5

I’m a little surprised that the presence of the porn on the computer didn’t become an issue for him.

At least in all the places where I’ve been ‘IT’, public and private, what you do on the job is between you and HR; but if you did it with the workplace computer and/or network, it’s also subject to some theoretically-draconian-but-rarely-vigorously-applied ‘Acceptable Use Policy’, which would generally preclude porn.

Under such circumstances, if all the porn was on a personal device, and any browsing done over your own cellular data plan or the like, the AUP would be irrelevant. If not, it would not look good in the review of your case.


#6

Porn can be viewed on laptops, eh? I knew I shouldn’t have gotten an iPad.


#7

That’s what happens when you have an employment contract. An employment contract with the same terms at a private company would have the same results. The government is entitled to try to negotiate a different appeals process, and if it is as this article says, they should.


#8

Virtual sex brings with it virtual viruses, just like the real thing. How secure is his work laptop if he’s able to log onto porn sites?


#9

Laptop computers, such as the one seen here, can be used to view pornography

Made my day.


#10

Just be careful how you’re using that laptop. Or get a cooling pad…


#11

Sounds like the Fed’s could use a DPYLD. You busy @Falcor?


#12

Yep.
My wife is a manager for a big company, it’s extremely hard to get rid of anyone.
I worked for many years as a youngster in a union job, it was no harder/easier to can anyone there, either.
In reality, I probably saw more people fired on the spot more than in the regular corporate world.
That being said, I’m glad we have the worker protections we do in the USA, and especially in my home state - CA.


#13

This is one reason why the government sucks. Their inability to fire people who suck is just outrageous.

My ex works for the Dept. of Labor. There are people who spend at least half the day doing nothing. It took many years of complaints to get a sexual predator fired, and he was on paid leave for over a year.


#14

Dude, I’ve been working in corporate america for 30 years, there are plenty of people that do zero all day long. They look busy, they SOUND busy, but they don’t do shit.
In reality, it might be better if the lazy assholes didn’t do anything, as they would probably fuck it up.
But overall, the workplace protections are good for everyone as it keeps management in check. It’s like when we get mad at “all these rights that criminals have” when they get arrested. Our police state is bad enough as it is…


#15

My doctors told me I have to avoid pork.


#16

I once gave permission to two of my employees to watch porn. At the time I told them “I can’t ethically command you to watch anything you find objectionable in order to hone your web skills, but it appears that the porn sites are technically far ahead of all other sites, so I will give you written permission to visit porn sites on the job and study the way they use web technologies.” That was before anything other than porn was making a profit on the web, though - nowadays I just tell people to study Amazon, Ebay and Paypal.


#17

If I recall correctly, tables. Lots and lots of tables.


#18

Wow I have the wrong job…errnowait.
I kinda miss working from home where I had my non work machine next to me as well and could look up/at NSFW (not porn, well mostly not porn anyway) stuff on it though I mostly miss not having to deal with commute traffic.


#19

IIRC, also couches, divans, kitchen counters, and fancy swingsets


#20

Yo dawg, I heard you like tables! So we put tables in your table, so you can table your tables while tabeling your tables.

Tables.